Maps for the Getaway
by Francesca Jones
Summary: Rory's starting a new chapter in her life, but doesn't know what role Jess wants to play in it. Lit. Set directly after AYITL. Complete.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:** It's so strange to be inspired to write fanfic again, but A Year In The Life has my mind buzzing with all the literati possibilities. Hope you all enjoy this. Title is from the song of the same name by Andrew McMahon in the Wilderness.

 **MAPS FOR THE GETAWAY**

 **One**

Half the guests at Luke and Lorelai's wedding reception were sipping champagne; the rest were drinking coffee with their dessert. Rory would've killed for either beverage. She sat at a table by herself, enjoying the momentary quiet. Her mother was dancing slowly with her new husband, her eyes closed and a small smile on her face. When she looked at them, Rory knew that she would be OK. Her mother's life hadn't taken the path she'd planned either, and it had turned out just fine. Just because Rory had been derailed didn't mean that this was the end. She could still have a happy ending, someday. It wouldn't be with Logan. Hell, maybe it wouldn't be with anyone. Whatever it would be, it was a long way down the road. There was so much to think of before that. There was a book to write, and a tiny baby growing inside of her. She would move forward and forge her own way, just like her mother did when she was only a teenager. But she was so much luckier than her mom had been when she got pregnant.

She couldn't imagine what it had been like for Lorelai as a teenager, to feel so alone. Rory knew that her mother would help her and support her no matter what, and Lorelai's reaction hadn't disappointed. She had hugged Rory tightly and promised her that she would stand beside her no matter what. She had made her typical nervous quips and sarcastic comments, and she was clearly scared. She knew how hard it was to be pregnant and alone. But Lorelai promised her daughter that no matter what disagreements they might have (and both knew there would be many), Rory would always be able to count on her. Rory knew this, of course, but she had never needed to hear it more than in that moment. Lorelai had only asked one thing of her daughter:

" _Have fun at the wedding. Please."_

Rory was trying to honor that promise, even though her head was spinning with a million thoughts and scenarios. She needed to decide if she was staying in Stars Hollow, if she'd stay with her mom or move into her own place, how to tell Logan. Ugh, the mere thought of that was terrifying and made her want to cry at the same time. It had been so hard for her to let go of him and what he represented for her, and now she had to let him back into her life on some level. She already knew that she wouldn't marry him, but she also knew that he wouldn't ask. His solution would be to throw money at her and the baby. Would she accept it? That was another question she would need to answer sooner rather than later.

"Maid of honor." A voice said in greeting, and Rory looked at Jess as he slid into the seat next to her. He was holding a plate with a generous slice of cake in one hand and a tumbler of whiskey in the other.

Rory's lips involuntarily curled upward at the sight of him: sexy, disheveled, and clearly slightly uncomfortable in his suit. "Best man."

"So I know it's been a whirlwind, but I can't figure out how Rory Gilmore hasn't had a slice of cake yet." Jess slid the cake over to her.

"Thanks." Rory said with a teasing smile. "Surprisingly thoughtful of you."

"That hurts." He teased back with a pout, bringing a hand to his chest.

"No it doesn't." She responded, taking a small bite of the cake. She was sure it was delicious, but she didn't even really taste it.

"Nah, not really. I've been called way worse, by both you and your mother." Jess smirked and took a sip of his drink.

"All well-deserved, mind you. Well, mostly." Rory corrected herself, remembering how viciously harsh her mother had been to Jess when they'd first met, well before he'd done anything to warrant her hostility. His mere existence had been excuse enough for Lorelai. It was funny because now they got along great. Hell, these days Lorelai spent way more time with Jess than Rory did.

"I can admit that." Jess agreed. "But you've got to admit, I cleaned up ok."

Rory took another bite of cake and smiled at him. "I think it's just a nice suit."

Jess did that playful pout again and Rory just shook her head. He had cleaned up more than OK. He ran a small, successful book press, his second novel had a 'New York Times Bestseller' sticker on the cover, and he looked amazing. He had always been good looking, but as an adult he'd developed a confidence that made him downright sexy. The fact that he had clearly been working out didn't hurt either. Rory had noticed all this when she'd last seen him four years ago, she noticed it over the summer when he came to see her, and she was certainly noticing it now, even though she had absolutely no business doing so.

"In all seriousness," Jess began, and the teasing had gone out of his eyes. "How are you doing?"

Rory choked on her cake and started to cough so hard that Jess had to pat her back to help it subside. Her eyes watered and she couldn't tell if it was from the coughing or if tears were forming. Jess was looking at her quietly, waiting for an answer.

"Truth?" Rory asked, wiping her eyes.

"Always."

"I'm going through some stuff. A lot of stuff. And I am working my way towards being ok." Rory said honestly. She wondered what he would say if she told him the full truth- that she had been Logan's mistress for longer than she cared to admit and that she was pregnant with his child. She hadn't been afraid to tell Lorelai, she wouldn't be afraid to tell Luke once they returned from their honeymoon, hell, she wasn't even really afraid to tell her grandmother, but Jess...she was terrified to see the look on his face when he found out. He would be disappointed, and she wasn't ready to disappoint him.

"Is it the job thing?" Jess asked. "Because I'm pretty sure you could get Taylor to pay you for the Gazette gig, if that's where your heart is. Besides, once your book is done you'll be beating off offers with a stick."

"You have a lot of faith in me." Rory said appreciatively.

Jess brushed that off with a crooked smile and said, "I'm just hoping you'll consider Truncheon when the time comes. My motives are completely selfish."

"Oh well that makes sense." Rory sarcastically agreed.

"Hey you two!" Babette exclaimed as she danced by with Morey. "This is a wedding not a funeral! Jess Mariano, you'd better dance with that girl before I tell Ms. Patty you're over here looking for a partner!"

Rory and Jess shared a charged, awkward look before Jess stood up. He offered his hand and said, "You're not really going to make me dance with Ms. Patty, are you?"

Rory didn't hesitate to slide her hand into Jess's, even though her heart was jumping in her chest. They walked to the dance floor and Jess put his hands around Rory's waist, pressing his palms flat against her lower back. She tentatively wrapped her arms around his neck, the tips of her fingers toying with the ends of his hair.

"You need a haircut." Rory murmured absentmindedly.

"Yeah? I kind of like it." Jess said with a shrug.

"I kind of do too." Rory agreed as they swayed in time with the music. "This is nice."

"I don't hate it." Jess agreed, pulling her a little closer. They stayed like that until the song ended. Rory looked up into his hazel eyes, which were much softer and sweeter than she remembered.

"Wanna get out of here?" Jess asked after a long moment.

Rory knew with every fiber of her being that she should say no.

"Ok."


	2. Chapter 2

**Two**

They talked for hours in the apartment above the diner. Jess was staying there while he was in town, as he usually did. They sat on the couch as they talked. They started out on opposite ends, but soon they were as close as they could be without touching. Eventually they ended up even closer. Rory flung her legs into Jess's lap and he gently rested a hand on her ankle. They laughed as they talked about books, movies, music, and life. They caught up on things they'd missed in each other's lives over the past years, with Rory strategically omitting any mention of Logan, their affair, and the baby.

"So what did you do next?" Rory asked, tears of laughter in her eyes.

"What was I supposed to do?" Jess asked. "I apologized to the showgirl for Matt's behavior, gave her back her headpiece, and we were all escorted off the premises by the largest security guard I've ever seen. Not quite the way I pictured spending my last night in Vegas, I have to say."

The tears rolled and Rory's face turned red as she laughed. Jess chuckled and watched her thoughtfully. "I don't know if I've ever made you laugh like that before."

Rory shrugged and wiped the tears off her cheeks. "You didn't used to be this funny."

"I guess that's it." Jess said, reaching over and pushing a strand of her hair behind her ear.

"Jess…" Rory started, but was silenced by Jess's mouth on hers. It was gentle, but Rory could feel the intensity behind it. Her body responded automatically, leaning into him and matching his passion with her own. Rory tentatively reached up her hand to Jess's face as they kissed.

Jess pulled away and rested his forehead against hers. "I've wanted to do that-."

"I'm pregnant." Rory cut him off, dropping her hand.

Jess blinked a few times and pulled back so he could look Rory in the eyes. "I'm not that good of a kisser."

Rory let out a laugh, but as she'd feared, the entire mood had changed. He immediately lifted her legs off his lap and stood, creating as much physical space between them as he could.

"I just found out." Rory explained weakly. "No one else knows besides my mom."

"I thought you broke up with that Paul guy." Jess said, still looking anywhere but at her.

"He broke up with me, actually." Rory said quietly. "But it's not his. Logan. Do you rem-"

"I remember him." Jess cut her off shortly.

Rory nodded at that. She knew that Jess wouldn't have forgotten his awful encounter with Logan, or that embarrassing incident between her and Jess at Truncheon- her failed attempt to use him for sex to get back at Logan for his cheating.

"He's engaged. I was his mistress. God, it's such an ugly word, but it's the right one. I ended it though. A couple months ago.."

"But not before he knocked you up." Jess observed. She had anticipated some sort of anger from him, but instead his voice had become sort of vacant- like he was discussing the weather with a stranger and not Rory's pregnancy. He was standing in the doorway to the kitchen now. He looked ready to jump out the window if it would get him farther away from her.

"No, I guess not." Rory felt a tear trickle down her cheek, and she longed for just a moment ago when her tears had been from laughter. "I don't expect you to get it or to be happy about it. I just needed to tell you."

"Why?" Jess demanded.

"I wasn't going to. Not yet. But that kiss…" Rory stood and crossed to him. He didn't back away from her, but he kept his arms folded tightly across his chest, his mouth set in a grim line. "I've tried to lead you on in the past, Jess. I couldn't do it then, and I won't do it now. You do not deserve that."

His face softened slightly, though his posture was still stiff. "Since we had coffee in Philadelphia four years ago."

Rory tilted her head to the side. "What?"

Jess sighed and it was like he'd deflated. He dropped his arms and his entire posture slumped as he leaned against the doorjamb. He was finally showing an emotion, but it wasn't anger. He seemed...sad. "That's how long I've wanted to kiss you. Since you walked into my store four years ago and asked me to have coffee with you."

Rory let her mouth turn up into a small smile. It had been a complete impulse that sent her into Truncheon that day. She'd been in Philadelphia working on a freelance piece for an online magazine, and at the last minute she'd decided to go see him. He'd taken her to a little coffee shop and they'd talked for hours, just like they'd been doing tonight. It had gotten so easy to talk to Jess, which sort of amazed her. Talking had certainly not been his forte when they were teenagers. Jess's progression from angsty punk kid to a kind and genuine man truly awed and inspired her. Whenever she spent time with him now, she always had a warm feeling in her chest. It was special. _He_ was special. She'd first recognized that when they were kids, but it was different now. And if he had made a move four years ago, she would've reciprocated.

"I would've let you." Rory said honestly. "You could've kissed me that day."

"I should've-."

"Don't." Rory quickly cut him off. "Don't do that. It won't make anything better."

Jess closed his mouth and nodded. Rory could see the muscle popping in his jaw as he clenched his teeth. Finally he asked, "So what now?"

"Now? I try to figure out how to be a mom, and write a book in the meantime. I'd like your help, if you're willing. It's ok if you're not." She added quickly.

"Well I don't know much about being a mom." Jess joked, his crooked smile appearing for just a second. "But your book…"

Jess trailed off as he walked over to the corner where his tattered green duffel bag sat. He unzipped it and pulled out a stack of papers. He walked back to Rory and wordlessly handed them to her, waiting for her reaction.

It took Rory a moment to process what she was looking at, and finally she looked back up at Jess. "These are my first three chapters."

"Well how 'bout that?" Jess said, the smirk returning.

"You stole my book." Rory accused. She thumbed through the pages and saw his handwriting all over them. "And put notes in all the margins. What year is it?"

Jess shrugged and said, "Old habits die hard. I knew you'd ask me to read it eventually. Why delay the inevitable?"

"God, how much did you write?" Rory asked, still looking through all the pages.

Jess's eyes were gleaming as he said, "Well, what is much?"

Rory smiled and looked up at him. Just like he didn't forget the bad things, Jess didn't forget the good things either. Neither did she. The looked at each other for a long moment without saying anything, and it was Jess who broke the silence.

"Do you remember what I said about us? That first time you came to Truncheon?" He asked.

"It is what it is." Rory said quietly, clutching the pages to her chest.

"It is what it is." Jess repeated. "I guess that still stands."

"Yeah." Rory said quietly. "I guess so."

"I'm going back to Philly tomorrow." Jess said unceremoniously.

Rory nodded. Her mouth felt suddenly dry and she looked down at her feet. She knew he didn't live here, but at the same time she couldn't help but feel disappointed to know she wouldn't see him the next day.

"You can email me your next few chapters. If you want." Jess finished. "It's good, Rory. It's you. On every single page, it's you."

She looked at the pages in her hands again. She felt the same way about his work, and had told him so on multiple occasions. To have the compliment returned meant more to her than she could say.

"Thank you, Jess. You could've been a dick about this, and I wouldn't have blamed you."

Jess sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Contrary to popular belief, I have never, ever wanted to hurt you, Rory. Your lousy taste in men and poor grasp on the concept of birth control don't change that."

Rory met his gaze and saw the light had returned to his eyes just for a moment as he teased her. They shared a quiet moment of understanding and a sad smile before Jess said, "Come on. I'll take you home."


	3. Chapter 3

**Three**

 _4 months later_

Rory took a deep breath and pushed the heavy wooden door. A little bell jangled above her head as she entered Truncheon Books. They had moved to a different building since the last time she'd been there. This one was bigger, which was necessary to accommodate the additional printing presses. It also had an attached space for performances and art exhibitions, and an expanded storefront. When you walked in now, you were surrounded by books and art but not suffocated by them like in the old place. It had been cool and charming, but the business had simply outgrown it. The new building was still charming, but it was sleeker and more appropriate for a business that had been consistently successful for over a decade.

"Well if it isn't famed journalist Rory Gilmore." Matt Carson, Jess's business partner, said from his place behind the register, where he sat perched on a stool with a book in his hand.

"Hi Matt." Rory said with a smile. Matt was the opposite of Jess in so many ways. He was unbelievably friendly and outgoing. When they'd met four years prior, he'd immediately friended her on all her social media accounts and they'd stayed in contact ever since.

"How's it going?" He came over to hug her and exclaimed, "Wow, you're pregnant! Or did you get fat? No, definitely pregnant. Right? Please say pregnant so I don't feel like an asshole."

"Pregnant." Rory agreed, hugging him and laughing. "How are you? How's Molly?"

"Wonderful!" Matt exclaimed, pointing at a picture hanging behind the register. It was a photo of him and his pretty wife Molly, as well as a grinning toddler. "Mischa is two now."

"She's beautiful. Congratulations."

"Thanks! So to what do we owe the pleasure today?"

Rory smiled. "Well, I'm writing a book."

"I know!" Matt said, hugging her again. She'd forgotten that he was a hugger. "Jess keeps the pages under lock and key. We've been together twelve years and there's just no trust."

"Wow, twelve years." Rory repeated. She couldn't believe how long it had been since Jess had started down this path. She'd been panicked and taking time off from Yale while he'd been planting the seeds that had grown into Truncheon. He had gone from troubled, aimless teenager to successful artsy businessman, and she was still struggling. Who would've thought?

"Is he here?" Rory asked. "I've been having a hard time getting a hold of him." That was an understatement. He hadn't answered a call, email, or text message since she'd sent him the last chapters, and she was afraid she knew why. The last few chapters had been about him.

"Today's his first day back, actually. He was in New York all last week." Matt said.

"Oh." Rory said, feeling stupid and impulsive for showing up here on a whim. Of course she hadn't heard from him because he was busy, and not because he was avoiding her. What was she thinking? She could probably blame it on the pregnancy. It was affecting everything else, why not her impulse control?

"Come on back, I'll take you to his office." Matt said. "Cecilia!"

A beautiful girl peeked her head out from the shelves. Her big brown eyes were magnified by her black-framed glasses, and her brown hair had bright red streaks in it. She walked over to Matt and Rory, and Rory felt instantly jealous of her slim waist and the way her torn jeans clung to her perfect figure. Her fitted black t-shirt read 'I LOVE BIG BOOKS, SMALL BOOKS, ALL BOOKS' in big block letters, and it had Truncheon's logo printed on the sleeve. Rory missed when her clothes had fit her that well.

Rory pulled awkwardly at her Bon Jovi t-shirt. It had been her mother's when she was pregnant with her, and fit over her growing belly more than most of her clothes. She really hadn't gained that much weight yet, only about 15 pounds, but at the moment she felt like a house.

"Cecilia, will you watch the counter? I'm taking Rory up to Jess's office." Matt directed. Cecilia and Rory made eye contact and Cecilia smiled brightly at her.

"No problem." She said, moving to take a spot behind the register. "While you're back there, tell him to figure out where he wants to get lunch today."

Matt motioned for Rory to follow him and started walking towards the back of the store.

"It's nice you have help in the shop." Rory commented, hoping she sounded casual and not jealous of the pretty girl who was having lunch with Jess.

Matt smiled and shook his head, "No, Cecilia's our partner in the business. She has a Masters in Publishing from Pace. We brought her in when Chris took that job with Random House a few years ago."

If the jealousy had been tickling the back of Rory's neck, now it was beating her over the head. She'd known that Chris had left and they'd gotten a new partner, but she was certain Jess had never mentioned it was a gorgeous girl with hipster hair and a master's degree. She followed Matt down a hallway to Jess's office. He knocked on the door but there was no answer so he knocked again.

"I don't want to talk about lunch yet, Cece!" Jess yelled from the other side of the door. Rory felt another strange, unwanted pang of jealousy at Jess's nickname for hispartner.

"You've got a visitor, man!" Matt called in response.

There was a quiet shuffling and a moment later, Jess opened the door. His eyes fell on Rory immediately and half his mouth curved up in a smirk. "Hey."

"Hey." Rory said sheepishly.

"Thanks, Matt." Jess said, and his tone was clearly dismissive. Matt put a hand on Rory's shoulder and told her to say goodbye before she left, and then he turned and walked back towards the storefront.

"Come in." Jess said, gesturing to his office. Even though his initial reaction had been that sexy half-smile, now his face was set into a grim line. He knew exactly why she was here.

"Wow, your own office." Rory commented, looking around. It was simple and disastrously cluttered. There were manuscripts and imprints and papers stacked everywhere, some that looked close to toppling over. There was a large dartboard hanging on the wall, right next to a bulletin board with index cards announcing upcoming deadlines. There were also flyers for local bands, a postcard of the New York skyline, and a single, unframed photograph of Jess, Luke, and Liz at her wedding to TJ.

"It beats holding meetings in my living room." Jess said with a shrug, taking a seat. He threw his legs up on his desk and leaned back in his chair. "Kinda suits me, right?"

"No 'kinda' about it." Rory agreed, sitting across from him. "The new place looks great."

"Thanks." Jess said. "Not too new though. It'll be three years in May."

"Oh." Rory said quietly. "Time flies."

"It does." Jess agreed. He sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. "I read the chapters."

"It was messed up for me to send them." Rory cut in quickly. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have. It's just that your notes have all been so helpful. No one gets the tone I'm going for like you do and I trust your opinion and-."

"Rory, slow down." Jess said with a little laugh in his voice. He pushed himself up from his chair and crossed to where Rory sat. He leaned against his desk and Rory was very aware of how close he stood to her. She'd seen him more than a few times in Stars Hollow. They'd sat and talked in the diner for hours. He'd even joined her, Lorelai, and Luke for dinner once; but this was the first time they'd been alone together since the night of the wedding. And Rory was unbelievably nervous to start. They kept in close contact about her book, and not hearing from him in over a week had sent her into a panic. She hated to think that he was upset with what she'd written about him and their past.

"I figured I'd be in the book." Jess said. "It wasn't a surprise."

"Oh." Rory said, starting to shake as tears fell down her cheeks. "Ok. I know I shouldn't have just barged in like this; I know you have a business to run. But it's been over a week and I hadn't heard from you and Matt told me you were in New York but I just hadn't heard from you and...God, why am I so nervous?"

"I have no idea but you're freaking me out." Jess joked, grabbing a tissue from a box on his desk and extending it to her. "And you're welcome here anytime, ok?"

"Ok." Rory agreed. She sniffed, snatched the tissue from his hand, and dried her tears. "I'm sorry. These pregnancy hormones are ridiculous."

There was a short but tense moment of silence as Jess looked at her thoughtfully. Finally he grabbed his coat and said, "C'mon, let's go get some lunch."

Rory didn't move. "What about Cece?" She asked.

Jess must've heard the odd twinge in her voice because he studied her for a moment with his head tilted. Finally, he simply said, "You're here. That changes things."

There was another quiet moment as they smiled at each other.

"What's Baby Gilmore craving today?" Jess asked.

"Chicken pot pie." Rory said without hesitation.

Jess smirked. "I know just the place."


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:** Thank you all so much to the lovely response to this story so far. It makes my heart happy that there are still people out there rooting for Rory and Jess!

 **Four**

"You still know the best places to eat." Rory said, shoveling chicken pot pie into her mouth.

Jess smirked over his coffee cup. They were sitting at a diner a few blocks away from Truncheon. Rory devoured her food while Jess had barely touched his turkey burger. He had, however, eaten all the fries.

"I like that you still eat all the fries first." Rory observed between bites. She took a sip of water. She wished she could be drinking coffee like Jess, but her obstetrician told her to limit it to one cup a day. Obviously she had already had her one cup as soon as she woke up that morning.

"I'm a creature of habit." Jess said, finally digging into his burger.

"I'm really sorry I just showed up here today." Rory apologized again.

Jess shook his head while he swallowed his food, then said, "I told you, you're always welcome here. You don't have to apologize for anything. I know you're emotionally unstable and that makes you unpredictable."

Rory glared at him and Jess's eyes lit up. "Finally mastered that withering stare, I see."

Rory felt her cheeks redden. She had described her trip to New York City to see him in painstaking detail in one of the chapters she'd sent him. It had been a defining moment in her life in so many ways. One look at Jess and she knew he was thinking about the exact same thing.

"The chapters-."

"What were you doing in New York last week?" Rory cut him off. She wasn't ready to talk about everything she had written about him and their relationship.

"A bunch of things." Jess shrugged. "Had meetings with a couple authors, and there's a couple bigger publishing houses interested in working with us."

"That's amazing." Rory gushed, and she truly meant it. "David Eggers is quaking in his boots."

"Still 99% sure he doesn't know who we are." Jess said dismissively. "But we're doing good. We'll be doing better once we land the author behind Gilmore Girls."

Rory blushed and shook her head. "It's not even a book yet."

"It's not finished, but it is very quickly becoming a book." Jess said insistently. "And I want to publish it."

Rory shoved another bite of pot pie in her mouth to avoid answering.

"The new chapters are good, Rory. Maybe the best yet. That's not why I've been avoiding you. I'm just...so sorry."

Rory shook her head vehemently. "I don't want you to apologize. We're way beyond that."

Jess leaned back and said, "I don't know if I'll ever be beyond it. I'm not proud of the way I used to be."

"You're not the same person you were then. Neither am I. That's kind of the point, isn't it?" Rory asked.

"It's one thing to know that I fucked up everything I touched. It's another to know how much it hurt you. To read it in print."

Rory sighed. "You read _all_ the chapters I sent you, right?"

Jess nodded and Rory sighed again. She was quickly becoming annoyed with him. "Then I guess you don't understand the tone of the book as well as I thought you did. Because your fuck-ups are _so_ not the point."

Jess polished off his burger and said, "Enlighten me, please."

"You aren't a cautionary tale. You're a redemption story."

Jess sucked in a breath. "That is a damn good line, Gilmore."

She smiled and lifted her shoulders in a shrug. "I've been told I'm an OK writer."

"Way, way more than OK. I'm still sorry, just so you know."

"If you need to hear me say you're forgiven, you are the most forgiven you can possibly be."

They shared a small smile. The waitress came by and asked if they wanted anything else. Rory bit her lip and looked hesitantly at Jess, and his smile widened as he looked at her.

"She'll have a piece of the pecan pie."

Rory grinned brightly at him. "And if you weren't completely forgiven before, you certainly are now."

* * *

"Which one should I buy?" Rory asked, looking over her shoulder at Jess. She held two books in her hands. They'd walked back to Truncheon and Jess was sitting behind the counter while Rory perused the store.

"You don't have to buy either." Jess responded, not looking up from the money he was counting. "I have copies of both in my office; you can have them."

"Really?" Rory asked, rolling her eyes. "I'm trying to support your business and you're telling me not to? You're awful at this."

"Hey, I'm doing just fine, thank you very much." Jess retorted, tucking a stack of 20s in an envelope and dropping them in the safe below the register.

"Jess, doll, let your friend buy our books." Cecilia said in a sing-song voice as she walked through the stacks, carrying her coat.

"Heading out?" Jess asked her, not looking up from the ledger where he was recording the money he'd just deposited.

"Yep." Cecilia leaned against the counter. "The suits from the bank are coming tomorrow so we're all getting here at seven."

"I remember." Jess finally looked up at her. "I'll even comb my hair."

"And wear a tie!" Cecilia insisted with a fond smile.

Jess's mouth set in a line and he said, "Button-down shirt, no tie."

"Good negotiating, Mariano. You should've been a lawyer." Cecilia winked at him and asked, "I'll see you tonight?"

Jess visibly stiffened, and Rory was suddenly aware that she was holding her breath as she waited for his response.

"Maybe." He said levelly. "I'll text you."

"Good deal. Rory, it was lovely to meet you!"

"You too!" Rory managed to croak out, knowing how red her face was. Cecilia sashayed out the door, leaving Rory and Jess alone.

After a long, tense moment Rory asked, "How long have you been dating her?"

"I'm not." Jess's answer was immediate, but it did little to assuage the clenching of Rory's heart and fists. She continued to look at Jess. He finally met her eyes and said, "Two years or so, on and off. We're not dating though. It's just...casual."

Again, his words didn't make Rory feel better. She stood there staring blankly as her agitated mind pictured Cecilia with her flat stomach and perfect ass, her hands all over Jess. She knew that she had no right to be upset over Jess's relationship status, whatever it happened to be. Rory stood there, pregnant with Logan Huntzberger's illegitimate child. It should have no bearing on her life whether or not Jess was having a long-term fling with his business partner. Yet there was a bead of sweat forming on her brow, and tears were forming in her eyes again. God, how many times was she going to cry today?

"Rory-." Jess threw down his pen and ledger and crossed over to her. She put up a hand before he could touch her.

"It's fine." She said quickly. "It is what it is."

Jess winced as she used his own words against him. He looked down at her outstretched hand and gently placed his palm flat against hers. He slowly and deliberately laced their fingers together. "You know I wish it was different, right? That this wasn't so complicated?"

"Yeah." Rory said, sniffling. She looked at their joined hands and felt her heart hammering in her chest. All of a sudden, she felt a small, sharp movement in her stomach. She gasped from the surprise of it, even though it didn't hurt at all. It was actually a very pleasant sensation. She felt the quick twinge again, and followed it with another gasp. She dropped Jess's hand and put both hands on her stomach, where she felt her baby kick for a third time.

"What's wrong?" Jess asked, his voice filled with concern. He immediately placed both of his hands over hers on her stomach. "Are you ok? Do you need a doctor?"

"No." Rory shook her head vigorously with a smile on her face and tears flowing down her face. "She's kicking. She's never kicked before."

Jess's eyes went wide as the baby kicked again, right under their hands. He quickly pulled his hands away from Rory's stomach like he'd been burned, and Rory had to fight not to show her disappointment at his reaction.

"It's…" Jess swallowed thickly and started again. "You're having a girl?"

Rory nodded, the smile still on her face as she thought about her daughter. "Another Gilmore Girl. The world is absolutely not ready."

"Congratulations." Jess's voice was thick and strangled.

"Thanks." Rory whispered. After a long, stifling pause, she said, "I-I guess I should get going."

"You don't have to." Jess said. Rory knew he meant it, but she also knew that the awkwardness between them would not be passing any time soon. Every time she talked about the baby, Jess got weird and distant and his reaction now had been the worst yet. She didn't know what she expected from him; she just knew that she was so excited, and she wished he could share that with her.

"I do." Rory said. "I definitely do."

"Ok." Jess agreed, somehow looking relieved and disappointed at the same time. "But wait just one minute."

Jess jogged through the store and to the back. When he returned a few moments later, he was carrying a thick stack of papers. He wordlessly handed them to Rory, and she knew without looking that it was her latest chapters, complete with his notes.

"Thanks." Rory said, swallowing thickly. She went to flip through the pages, but Jess quickly put a hand over hers.

"Not yet." Jess said insistently. "Wait til you're back in Stars Hollow to look at them. Promise?"

"Promise." Rory said quietly. "So...see you around."

"Yeah. See you." Jess agreed, tucking a strand of hair behind Rory's ear before letting her turn and walk out the front door.


	5. Chapter 5

**Five**

Rory kept her promise and didn't read the pages until she was back at home, sitting up in bed with a pillow behind her head and one hand resting comfortably on her stomach. She picked up the pages and was surprised by how thick the stack seemed. She could've sworn she'd only written about half that much. She opened to the first page, and was surprised to see that it was free of Jess's handwriting. The page looked stark and naked without his scrawled script (which turned into blocky capital letters when he was excited or running out of room, not that she'd noticed). Every page she had written up to this point, he had covered in notes. Even when he couldn't get to Stars Hollow, he scanned them and e-mailed them to her. She didn't realize until that moment how much comfort she took in seeing that red ink splashed over every page. But to see even this first page with nothing on it filled Rory with dread and disappointment. He'd said that it was ok that she'd written about him, but clearly it wasn't.

Rory looked down at the words she'd written. She hadn't started with their first meeting, any of the flirtation, or even the car accident. She'd started with that day in New York, with that moment when she'd seen the back of his head in Washington Square Park and she'd known it was him. She'd described the way her heart raced her chest when he'd turned around and smiled at her, and every single moment of the amazing day they spent together. She had called him James throughout the chapters- for James Dean of course, her own little private joke. She was unbelievably proud of what she had written.

 _I missed my mother's business school graduation because I went to New York to see a boy. Let me repeat that. I, Lorelai Leigh Gilmore, skipped my mother's business school graduation. It was an accident. Well, missing her graduation was an accident. Going to New York to see James absolutely was not. It was the most spontaneous and rebellious thing I had done in my life up to that point. James was the person in my life who started to bring out that side of me, even though I didn't quite realize that yet._

 _He'd been living in Stars Hollow with his uncle, the one and only Luke Danes, when I met him. I can admit now that I was attracted to him immediately, but at the time he sort of snuck up on me. I didn't realize how much I wanted to be near him until it was no longer an option. He moved back to New York after he and I got into a car accident that resulted in me spraining my wrist. It probably goes without saying that my mother did not like James very much._

 _She hated him from the moment she met him, and at the time I didn't understand it. I know now that her reasons were twofold. First, she saw a great deal of herself in that rebellious teenager who didn't want anyone to help him, and who was his own worst enemy in so many ways. Second, at some point she figured out that I was falling for him. She knew it long before I did, was able to say it out loud way before I ever did._

 _I missed him when he left. He was so smart, probably the only person I knew who read as much as I did, and he made me laugh. He challenged me at a time when I didn't realize how much I needed that in my life. It upset me to think of him in New York when I wanted him to be with me. So on the day of my mother's business school graduation, instead of going to school in Hartford, I took a bus to New York City._

 _I've done many impulsive things since getting on that bus, but this was the first time I had done something of this magnitude. I wasn't this girl. I was a goody-two-shoes. I went to school everyday. I got perfect grades. I didn't sneak off to New York to see a boy who wasn't my boyfriend (did I forget to mention that Reed was still in the picture at this point? Because he was). Later on, I'd be a girl who slept with her married ex-boyfriend. I'd become a girl who stole a yacht and dropped out of Yale for a semester. And even later than that, I'd be a girl who jet-setted to London on a semi-regular basis to have an affair. But in that moment in New York City, I was a very good girl who just couldn't go another minute without seeing a troubled boy._

 _It was worth it the moment I saw him sitting on that bench in Washington Square Park. As I navigated my way there, my heart was pounding out of my chest. I didn't know if he'd be there, and if he wasn't the trip would be an absolute waste because I didn't know his phone number or where he lived (hey, I told you it was impulsive!). I had absolutely no back-up plan. I hadn't even thought about a back-up plan during the long bus ride. But he was there. And when I walked up to him, he smiled at me with this sexy confidence that no 17-year-old should be allowed to possess. He looked at me like he'd known all along that I'd seek him out, like taking a bus to another state on a whim was totally in character for me and not an anomaly. It was the first of many times that James would prove that he knew me better than I knew myself._

Rory turned to the next page to see if he'd made any notes there, but he hadn't. Rory was filled with disappointment. She flipped through the rest of the chapter and still nothing. Still holding out hope for some reason, she turned to where the next chapter should've started. It took her a long moment to digest what she found there. The next page wasn't hers. It was a full page of Jess's writing. She flipped through and found more and more pages like that. Rory read it three times before she realized what she was seeing. It was the entire chapter, but from Jess's point of view.

 _I almost didn't go to Washington Square Park that day. I was hanging out with my friends Eddie and Mac and we'd decided we were going to spend the day drinking in Eddie's apartment. Mac happened to be in possession of the best fake ID in the state of New York, which he used to buy us each a six pack. Then Eddie's mom came home from work early and kicked me and Mac out before we'd even had a sip of our PBR. I was ready to call the day a bust and head back home but the problem was I didn't really have a home at the time. Mom's boyfriend of the week and I didn't exactly get along so I was couch surfing pretty regularly. I'd spent the night before on Eddie's couch, but that clearly wasn't going to be an option again. I would have to wait until Liz and what's-his-name left for the evening before I had a place to stay which meant I had plenty of time to kill. I had a book with me like I always did and I just had a feeling I should go to my park bench and read, maybe stare at my shoes for a while. It's such a rom-com trope to say I 'had a feeling' but just because it's cliche doesn't mean it's not true._

 _I was reading Tom Wolfe at the time and making notes all over the margins like usual. But in addition to my typical brilliant and colorful commentary, there was a new note that I found popping up everywhere. I would find myself underlining words or phrases and writing RG as small as I could. Every single book that I read, I wanted to know what she thought. That was how I knew she was different. I had never cared what anyone thought before- about books, about me, about anything. What Rory Gilmore thought mattered to me. It would be years before I actually admitted that to myself. I knew I liked her from the moment I met her but admitting that she mattered? Admitting I cared about something? I had a whole lot of growing up to do before I could acknowledge that._

 _I could pretend that I knew she would be there that day but I had absolutely no clue. I had that gut feeling I should head over to the park, but my gut was deliberately vague about the whole thing. The truth is I had already resigned myself to never seeing her again. As far as everyone was concerned, I had forfeited the right to be around her when I crashed her car. I could pretend I was outraged. I could feign indignance. But the truth was, I got it. If there is one thing I know to be true it is that I was never good enough for Rory Gilmore. It never mattered to me that she was the princess of the psych ward that is Stars Hollow but certain facts were undeniable. Rory was good. She was kind and she wanted everybody to be happy. She was smart and funny and beautiful and the only person I had ever met who saw something in me. Someone that amazing saw something in me other than sarcastic comments, failing grades, and a few criminal mischief convictions. My stupid, self-defeating brain couldn't handle the concept. I simultaneously wanted to make her proud and prove that she was wrong to believe in me. Unfortunately, my switch would be stuck on 'self destruct' for several more years._

 _At that moment though, sitting in Washington Square Park and sharing a secret smile with the most beautiful girl in the world, none of that mattered. When it was just the two of us it was so easy to forget all the bullshit. It was just me and Rory that day, and she had sought me out. She wanted to see me so badly that she skipped school and hopped on a bus to do it. It was in that moment that I realized something equally terrifying and amazing. No matter what anyone else thought, Rory Gilmore thought I was good enough for her._

 _I would screw that up in due course._

Tears splashed onto the page and Rory realized she was crying, though she couldn't quite pinpoint why. Her heart hammered in her chest as she realized how deeply that day in New York had affected him. He played everything so cool and close to the chest. For years, she'd never had a clue what was going on in his head. Even when he'd come back into her life after he wrote The Subsect, they had never gone back and talked about those early days. They'd both been in the same place that day, but neither of them had been willing to say it.

Rory's phone vibrated on the nightstand and she reached for it. As if he knew she'd just finished reading, it was a text from Jess that simply read, _Check your e-mail_.

Rory followed the directive and opened her email on her phone. She saw immediately that she had a new message from Jess, which had an attachment much too big for her to open until she had her laptop.

Rory opened the e-mail anyway and read what Jess had written.

 **Rory,**

 **Here are my notes.**

 **Use my real name. Jess Mariano was the one who did all those things you wrote about, and the world should know that. Thanks for naming me after James Dean though.**

 **Jess**

There were so many things that Rory wanted to say to him. A million apologies and explanations and wishes for what the future could've been. The words died before Rory could ever even type them. There was nothing to say that would make anything better, or even make it any different than what it already was. So in the end, all Rory's reply email said was:

 **Jess,**

 **I knew you'd get the reference.**

 **Rory**


	6. Chapter 6

**Six**

 _A little more than three months later_

"Where are my girls?" Lorelai called as she entered Rory's house.

"Your daughter is on the couch." Rory responded. "Your granddaughter is still in my uterus, where she plans to stay _forever_."

"Still no contractions?" Lorelai asked sympathetically as she walked into the living room, carrying a to-go cup and a paper bag.

A few months earlier, Luke and Lorelai had bought the house directly behind Lorelai's and given it to Rory. Rory had made the appropriate perfunctory protests, but everyone knew she was going to accept it. It was actually perfect for her and the baby. It was a single-story, two bedroom house. The bedrooms were right next to each other, which was going to be wonderful for all those 3 a.m. feedings. It was charming and her mother had helped Rory make it her own. Rory had already started to give Lorelai money towards the mortgage payments, even though Lorelai tore up every check. Rory's response had been to start slipping twenty dollar bills into Lorelai's purse when she wasn't looking.

"No." Rory said, sulking. "And her tardiness isn't something she got from me, so it must be your bad influence."

"She'll get here in her own time." Lorelai said sweetly, ignoring Rory's irritability. She sat down in the armchair facing her daughter and put the bag on the table. "I brought tacos with extra hot sauce. They say eating spicy food helps."

"I'll try anything." Rory said, struggling to sit up. "I feel like I've been pregnant for two years."

Lorelai smirked as she opened the bag and pulled out the tacos. "She's only three days late, hon."

"Four." Rory snapped at her mother, snatching a taco out of her hand. "Four days late."

"My mistake, crankypants." Lorelai rolled her eyes.

"Sorry." Rory mumbled, her mouth already full of taco.

"You think you have problems? Guess where my mother is planning to stay when she comes to visit after the birth?" Lorelai asked grimly.

"No!" Rory exclaimed, laughing. "Why not just have her stay at the inn?"

"She wants to be close to her great-granddaughter, even if she is going to be born out of wedlock. Her words, not mine."

"I hate it when she says wedlock. I feel like a nineteenth century socialite who had a torrid love affair with a stableboy."

Lorelai raised an eyebrow and said, "Reading a lot of Harlequin romance novels, kid?"

Rory shook her head. "No. Pregnancy has just done weird things to my brain. When will I feel like myself again?"

"When it happens for me, I'll let you know." Lorelai joked with a smile.

Rory just looked at her mom blankly and said, "Harsh."

"I can't wait til you're not pregnant and miserable and you think I'm funny again." Lorelai said with a pout.

"Me too, mom. Believe me." Rory said. "What's Luke up to today?"

"Building a bookcase for the baby's room." Lorelai rolled her eyes, but her smile was happy and affectionate.

"What!" Rory exclaimed. "Why is he doing that?"

"Because he already made her a crib, a changing table, a rocking chair, and a dresser. You know building things is how he shows affection. He even roped Jess into helping him."

"Jess?" Rory asked, swallowing thickly. "Jess is here?"

"Yes." Lorelai said, studying her daughter's face. "Why did your voice get all high and squeaky right there?"

"I just didn't know he was coming. I haven't seen him in a while." Rory said.

Specifically, she hadn't seen him since her visit to Philadelphia. They had never spoken about his response to the chapters about him after that first night. They still e-mailed and texted, even talked on the phone once or twice a week, but as far as she could tell he had completely stopped coming to Stars Hollow. His pages had contained so much emotion, and Rory knew he was self-conscious about it. She didn't believe for one second that it was coincidence that he hadn't been around in three months. And even though he assured her that she was always welcome at Truncheon, she wasn't going to show up unannounced again after the last time had ended with her breaking into hormonal tears.

Lorelai sighed and brought her hand to her forehead. "Oh, God. I feel like I've gone back in time. Tell me this is just a major case of pregnancy brain and that your voice didn't just hitch over Jess."

Rory shrugged. "It's complicated."

"What else is new?" Lorelai said with a roll of her eyes. "Why am I just finding out about this now?"

"Because there's nothing to talk about." Rory said, placing her hands on her huge stomach. "I'm about to have a whole human to take care of. Having a crush on a boy has kind of taken a backseat."

"How long have you had a crush on him?" Lorelai asked, refusing to drop the subject.

Rory hesitated but finally answered, "Since your wedding? Kind of, sort of, I guess. I mean, maybe longer but that was when I realized it."

Lorelai's eyes widened and she laughed. She laughed loudly until tears began to form in her eyes.

"Why is that funny" Rory asked, frowning.

"Because your timing is ridiculous!" Lorelai exclaimed, still laughing. "You decided you like Jess again right after you found out you were pregnant!"

"And you wonder why you're just finding out." Rory snapped, her irritability returning. Seeing that Rory was getting upset, Lorelai managed to calm herself and stop laughing.

"Is he the reason you didn't try to make it work with Logan?" She asked, leaning back and taking a sip of her coffee. There was no judgment in her voice, just plain curiosity.

"No, Logan's new wife had way more to do with that than Jess did. Besides," Rory shifted as she tried to get comfortable. "I just don't love Logan anymore. And thanks to my strong female role model, I know that I don't need to be with the father of my baby to raise her right."

"Well that's true enough." Lorelai smiled at her. "You're going to be a wonderful mom, sweets."

"I hope so." Rory said, a shaky note to her voice. "I've been reading to her. Do you think she'll recognize my voice when she gets here?"

"Of course she will." Lorelai said assuredly. "So is that your way of telling me that you're tabling the Jess discussion?"

"There's no discussion!" Rory exclaimed. "Maybe there would be if things were different, but rekindling romance with my ex-boyfriend is kind of low on the priority list."

"He's grown up pretty ok, hasn't he?" Lorelai asked, as if she hadn't heard Rory. "Once he ditched all that teenage angst and hair product, there was a pretty funny guy with a good heart hiding underneath the surface."

"Lorelai Gilmore, are you...singing the praises of Jess Mariano?" Rory asked as she reached for a second taco, which she devoured with record speed.

Lorelai shrugged. "I call 'em like I see 'em, kid."

"Well there's no need. I know how wonderful he is. We talk almost every day and he's been invaluable to my book."

"But…?" Lorelai prompted.

"But I am two seconds away from having a baby. My mind is on her. And even if it wasn't the weirdest, worst time to think about a relationship…" Rory sighed and felt tears welling up in her eyes. "He hates her."

"Who hates who?" Lorelai asked, face contorted in confusion.

"Jess. He hates the baby."

Lorelai looked at her skeptically. "Really? He said that?"

"No." Rory shook her head. "He doesn't have to. You should've seen his face when I told him I was pregnant, and the one time he felt her kick he looked like he'd been burned, and every time I talk about her, he changes the subject."

"Ok….but not knowing how to talk to the pregnant woman you love about her baby and hating that baby are two very different things." Lorelai pointed out.

"Who said love?" Rory asked, panicked. She struggled to stand. "Why did you say love?"

"Because that hoodlum has been in love with you since he met you?" Lorelai said, watching Rory pace. "That can't be news to you."

"Not now." Rory snapped. "It's not like he's in love with me _now._ "

Lorelai opened her mouth to respond, but thought better of it and shrugged. "Yeah, you're probably right."

"Of course I'm right!" Rory exclaimed. "And another thing…" She trailed off and looked down at her legs. Her pale pink sweatpants darkened as liquid soaked through them.

"Mommy?" She asked, looking helplessly up at Lorelai.

"And that's your water breaking. Saddle up, kid. The newest Gilmore Girl is on her way!"


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N:** Thank you all so much for the positive response to this story. I'm having a great time writing it; very few things inspiring me like Jess & Rory's relationship and all the possibilities it presents. I find Rory's pregnancy to be the biggest challenge I've ever been presented as a literati fanatic, and I hope I'm doing it justice. Enjoy!

 **Seven**

 _Two weeks later_

"She's perfect." Lorelai said, tears welling in her eyes as she held her granddaughter. "Like, Gerber Baby perfect."

"You literally say that every time you hold her." Rory said, setting up the changing table so she could get her daughter into a new diaper. She reached out and took her from Lorelai. "C'mon, Trix. Let's get you changed."

"What did my mom say when you told her?" Lorelai asked. Rory had named her daughter Lorelai Annabelle Gilmore, and decided to call her Trix in honor of her grandfather and his affectionate nickname for his mother.

"She cried. Then she laughed. Then she cried again." Rory said, smiling down at her daughter as she removed her old diaper. "Did she tell you she's coming in next week?"

"Unfortunately." Lorelai said, reaching out and touching Trix's hand. "As long as we have this little angel as a buffer, maybe we'll actually survive it."

"This changing table is so beautiful." Rory said. "All the furniture is. Luke is amazing."

"He certainly is." Lorelai agreed, her affection for her husband written on her face. "He's bringing the bookcases over today."

"Bookcases? Plural? How many did he make?" Rory asked, lifting Trix up and giving her a series of kisses all over her face.

"I think I convinced him to stop at three." Lorelai said.

The doorbell rang and Rory gave Trix more kisses and said, "Come on, let's go see Grandpa Luke."

Rory walked towards the front door and called, "It's open, Luke."

The door slowly opened, but it wasn't Luke standing there. It was Jess.

"Hi." Rory said, standing up a little taller and holding Trix a little closer to her chest.

"Hey." Jess said. "Luke is loading the first bookcase on the dolly. Where do you want them?"

"In Trix's room." Rory said, shifting her feet awkwardly. "Luke knows where it is."

"Trix?" Jess asked, his mouth quirking up in a smirk.

Rory's face split into a proud, loving smile as she closed the space between them. "Jess Mariano, meet Lorelai Annabelle Gilmore. More commonly known as Trix, for my grandfather."

Jess swallowed thickly and took a step forward to peer into the baby's face. She had fine, wispy blonde hairs and big blue eyes that stared up at him.

"Gilmore?" He asked, still looking at Rory's daughter. "Not Blonde Dick at Yale?"

Rory smiled wryly and shook her head as she looked at her daughter. She'd already had to answer this question for her grandmother at least five times. "No, not Huntzberger. She's a Gilmore, through and through. Can't you tell?"

"Yeah, I guess I can. Welcome to the world, Trix." Jess said quietly. He reached out to touch her, but stopped himself before he did. "I have to go help Luke."

"Ok." Rory said, forcing her face not to waver. "I'm going to go into my room and feed her. Don't leave without saying goodbye."

Jess stopped in his tracks and turned to smile at Rory over his shoulder. "You know I don't do that anymore."

"Yeah." Rory said quietly as he retreated out the door. "I know."

"Rory, you've got to come see the bookcases!" Lorelai exclaimed, opening the door and walking into Rory's bedroom.

* * *

Rory was smiling down at Trix, who had fallen asleep after eating. Rory pulled her bra back into place and said, "Here, take her while I get myself put together here."

"Babe, button-down shirts. They'll be your best friend while you're breastfeeding, I swear."

"I know, I know." Rory said, pulling her t-shirt down and straightening it. It was black with a picture of Westley and Buttercup from _The Princess Bride_ on it. "It's just a fairy tale kind of day."

Lorelai was grinning as she snuggled Trix and said, "Come see what the boys did."

Rory followed her mom into Trix's room and gasped loudly at the sight in front of her. Three bookcases now lined the far wall, and they were absolutely perfect. They were beautifully put together, and painted white like the rest of the furniture Luke had made for Trix. The backboards behind the shelves were all covered in pages from fairy tales and children's books. Rory walked over to inspect them and saw that the sides were covered as well. She reached out to touch an illustration from Cinderella, tears filling her eyes.

"They're amazing. They're…" Tears started to fall. "Luke, I can't believe you did this." She crossed over to give him a hug, and he awkwardly reciprocated and patted her on the head.

"Jeez." He said. "I just built them. Jess did the thing with the books."

Rory squeezed Luke once more to show her gratitude, and turned to Jess. He was leaning casually against the doorjamb with his arms crossed, smirking at her.

"Jess…"

He shrugged. "Luke was building them anyway, I just made them cooler"

As he finished talking, Rory tackled him in a fierce hug, pushing him against the wall and throwing her arms around his neck.

"They're perfect." Rory whispered. "Thank you so much."

"I'm glad you like them." Jess said, tentatively returning her embrace.

Lorelai cleared her throat and Rory hesitantly pulled away from Jess. He was smirking at her as he said, "I'm here for a few more days. I want to talk to you about that last chapter you sent me, if you have some time."

"How about now?" Rory asked, looking over to where Trix was snoozing in Lorelai's arms. "She'll probably sleep for another hour or so."

"Sure, if you want."

Lorelai immediately started to make snoring noises and said, "Well that sounds dull. C'mon, husband, let's leave the book nerds to it."

"I prefer book rebel, if you don't mind." Jess said, making a face at Lorelai. She made a face back at him before gently setting Trix down in her crib.

Rory grabbed the baby monitor before showing Luke and Lorelai out of the house, knowing her mom would probably be back in a few hours. She was a helicopter grandparent for sure, but Rory couldn't complain. She was so grateful to have so many wonderful people helping her with her daughter.

Jess sank down on the couch and picked up small teddy bear that was sitting there. "How does it feel to not be pregnant anymore?"

"Wonderful." Rory said, sprawling out on the opposite end of the couch. "It was getting pretty rough towards the end there. But now I'm a mom, and that's actually terrifying."

"It's cool though. I mean, Trix is beautiful."

Rory tilted her head and looked at Jess with a quizzical smile on her face. It equal parts surprised and thrilled her to hear Jess compliment her daughter.

"You know," He continued brusquely, "For a baby."

Rory laughed. "You sound more like Luke all the time."

Jess smirked again. "Could be worse, right?"

"Way worse." Rory agreed. "So what did you think of the last chapter?"

Jess's smirk fell and he looked at her thoughtfully for a second before saying, "It's a lie."

Rory involuntarily sucked in a breath, feeling like she'd been punched in the stomach. "Excuse me?"

"All those things you said about me saving you when you dropped out of Yale. It's just not true. You saved yourself." Jess said seriously, which was funny only because he was still holding the teddy bear.

"Jess…" Rory started quietly. "You really...you really don't know?"

"Know what?" Jess asked, finally putting the stuffed animal down, but still not making eye contact with Rory.

"Jess, you _did_ save me." Rory said. She scooted closer to him and tucked her legs underneath her as she turned to fully face him. "I was drowning. I didn't even recognize myself, and you- brilliant, self-critical you- reminded me."

Jess shook his head. "You would've gotten there on your own."

Rory chuckled at that. "I still haven't gotten there! But I'm on my way, and I have always, _always_ attributed that to you. God, if you hadn't showed up when you did, I might still be drinking myself into oblivion and planning society functions. God, I might be president of the D.A.R by now." Rory shuddered at the thought.

Jess laughed lightly at that. He opened his mouth to speak, but Rory cut him off before he could get out a single word.

"And you just did it again!" She exclaimed, reaching over and slapping him on the shoulder. "You walked into the Gazette and put me back on track when I was going off the rails! _You_ told me to write this book, and it's the best thing I've ever done! Second best. That little girl in there is first."

"That's really how you feel?" Jess asked, leaning forward. Only then did Rory realize how close they'd gotten. It reminded her of the last time they'd been on a couch together, after the wedding when she'd told him she was pregnant.

"It's absolutely how I feel." Rory said insistently. "And I am not changing a word of it in the book."

"Well, maybe a few." Jess said. "I haven't taken my red pen to it yet."

Rory smiled at him and leaned back, putting her feet in his lap. "I can't wait to see what you do with it." She said, closing her eyes.

Jess looked down at her feet thoughtfully, then up at her. She smiled at him again, but didn't manage to say anything before she fell asleep.

* * *

When Rory woke, she was alone on the couch and Trix was whimpering on the other end of the baby monitor. Rory looked down at her phone and realized she'd been asleep for almost two hours. She couldn't believe Trix had slept that long. She frowned, wondering when Jess had left. She shouldn't have dozed off when they'd been having such a serious conversation, but she couldn't help it. She was just exhausted, and expected she would be for at least the next 10 years.

Rory stood and stretched, and then padded down the hall to Trix's room. She stopped dead in her tracks when she heard Jess's voice, speaking in soft tones to her daughter.

"And the moral of that story is that you can't just tell a girl you love her and run away before she can answer. So if anyone ever does that to you, make sure you don't let him back into your life. No matter how many mediocre books he writes."

"We'll have to agree to disagree on the moral of that story, Mariano." Rory said, walking in to see him sitting in the rocking chair with Trix up over his shoulder as he rubbed her back. Jess looked up at her and his smile was shy and unsure.

"Hey, hope this is ok. I figured you could use the sleep." He said sheepishly.

"Thanks." Rory said, grateful and awed by the sight before her. "I didn't know you were any good with babies."

"I do have three half-sisters." Jess reminded her with a smirk.

"I always forget." Rory admitted. "Doula, Rainbow, and…"

"Beth." Jess said, rolling his eyes. "They're pretty great kids, despite their insane parents."

"Or maybe because of them." Rory pointed out, and Jess shrugged.

"She's just starting to fuss. It's probably about time for her to eat." Jess said, standing up and handing Trix to her mother.

"Thanks." Rory said quietly.

"I'll leave you to it." Jess said. "Maybe I'll stop by tomorrow? If that's ok?"

"It's definitely ok." Rory agreed, nodding.

"Good. I'll see you." Jess lightly touched her shoulder as he walked past her. Then he stopped, but didn't turn around to face Rory. "I'm not hanging out with Cece anymore."

"Huh." Rory said to herself, watching Jess retreat without looking back at her. She kissed Trix on the top of the head and took her over to the rocking chair so she could feed her. The chair was still warm from when Jess had occupied it only a few moments earlier.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N:** Apologies for the delay in updating. Business trips and grown-up responsibilities, blah blah blah. Please keep reviewing. It fills my cold, cynical heart with something resembling happiness. Seriously though, thank you for taking the time to read!

 **Eight**

"Happy half-birthday, Trixie." Jess said to the little girl as he picked her up and hugged her. She immediately latched her hands into his dark hair and tugged, making him wince and chuckle at the same time. Luke and Lorelai's house was filled with people celebrating that Trix was now 6 months old. She was wearing a bright pink onesie with a glittery gold '6' on it to celebrate.

"I hate it when you call her that." Lorelai said, reaching over to tickle Trix's foot while Jess held her.

"I know, why do you think I do it?" Jess retorted. "Besides, she likes it, don't you, Trixie?" He snuggled the baby and she laughed.

"I like it too." Rory said, coming up to them. "It's got a His Girl Friday kind of vibe."

"See?" Jess said, making a face at Lorelai.

"You're insufferable." Lorelai said good-naturedly. "Give me my granddaughter."

Lorelai took Trix from Jess, and walked over to Sookie and Jackson so they could coo over her.

"Thanks for coming." Rory said to Jess, lightly touching his arm. He looked down at her hand and then smirked at her.

"If I didn't come, who would've brought the traditional '6-month-old baby' gift?" He asked. He picked up a small, plain brown paper gift bag and handed it to Rory.

"You didn't have to get her anything. You've brought her plenty of stuff already." Rory smiled affectionately and looked in the bag, laughing at what was in there.

"This is the traditional gift for a 6-month-old baby?" She asked, pulling out _What Matters Most Is How You Walk Through the Fire_. "Bukowski?"

"Very traditional." Jess said seriously. "It's all in the famous baby book: _How To Raise a Kid Who Doesn't Suck_."

"You know, I don't think I read that one." Rory said, laughing and putting the book back in the bag. "Thank you. I'm sure she'll love it. But if you keep buying her books, there's not going to be any more room on her bookshelves."

Jess waved that off. "Luke will build her more."

"Don't give him any ideas!" Rory mock-whispered. "I don't have space for any more furniture in her room!"

"You look great, by the way." Jess said approvingly, successfully changing the subject.

Rory blushed and looked down at her jeans and button-down blue and white flannel shirt. The button-down shirt was practical for breastfeeding, just like Lorelai had said it would be. She had deliberately bought it a size too big because she was self-conscious about her body. It didn't look or feel the same to her since she'd had Trix. Her hips were wider than they'd ever been, and she had curves for pretty much the first time in her life. She couldn't even think about the stretch marks on her stomach without getting upset.

"Yeah? I feel like I'm dressed like Luke." She said dismissively.

"Maybe a little, but it works for you. Do me a favor and said 'no cellphones in here!'" Jess joked.

Rory swatted his arm. "I will not. Hey, your mom and sisters are in the kitchen if you want to say hi."

Jess nodded and picked up a few more bags he'd brought with him. "I've got books for them too. I got _Catcher in the Rye_ for Rainbow not too long ago and they all fought over it, so I just picked up _Nine Stories_ and got them each their own copy."

Rory laughed as Jess went off to find his family. She couldn't believe how things had turned around with him since Trix was born. It was a complete 180 from his awkward, distant behavior when Rory was pregnant. It wasn't immediate, but after that first night he'd met her he started asking about Trix. Then he started bringing her an occasional gift, and now he made time to stop by and see the two of them whenever he was in Stars Hollow. Rory couldn't explain the change in his attitude, and she refused to ask him about it in case it would break whatever spell Trix had over him. It just made her happy to see.

Rory walked up to where her mom, Luke, and Sookie were talking. Trix was beginning to squirm and Rory took her from Lorelai's arms. "Someone needs a new diaper."

"Don't talk about my husband that way!" Lorelai exclaimed, earning her a 'jeez' from Luke.

Rory took Trix upstairs to her mom's bedroom and changed her diaper. She started talking to Trix, like she usually did when they were alone together.

"There's so many people here to see you, Trix. I know you don't appreciate it yet, but you're so lucky to have so many people who love you. Grandma and Grandpa Luke would do absolutely anything for you, and Sookie and Jackson and Lane and Zach, and Liz and TJ. And next week you'll get to meet Paris and Doyle. If they're still back together, that is. They're crazy but they're good people, I swear. You'll get used to crazy people, we've got plenty in our lives. And Grammy Emily is nuts about you, so is Grandpa Chris and your Aunt Gigi. I can hardly count all the people who love you to pieces."

Trix made a little sound as Rory fastened her new diaper.

"Yes, and Jess. I think he likes you too." Rory sat Trix up on her lap and kissed her head. "You know, it's funny because when you were still in mommy's tummy, I thought he hated you."

"Is that what you thought?" Jess asked. Rory's head snapped up; she hadn't even heard him come upstairs. He walked in and sat down next to Rory on the bed. Trix immediately reached out for him, and he smiled as he took her from Rory's arms.

"What was I supposed to think?" Rory asked, watching with a smile as Trix grabbed at the collar of Jess's shirt. "You were always so cold and awkward about her."

Jess sighed. "It was never that I hated her. I just...look, I'm sorry I made you think that."

"What changed?" Rory asked, reaching out to touch her daughter's blonde head. His answer was completely unsatisfying, but she knew him well enough to know it was the best she'd get from him right now.

Jess looked down at Trix with a soft smile. "She has your eyes."

Again, it wasn't an answer, but the look on Jess's face as he looked at Trix was so sweet that Rory didn't push the subject any more.

"You're great with her." Rory gushed. "She adores you."

"The feeling is mutual." Jess said, but he wasn't looking at Trix. His eyes were trained on Rory's face and she could feel her skin getting warm.

"We should get back down to the party." Rory said, clearing her throat.

"Yeah." Jess said, standing and holding Trix. "C'mon, kid. Your public awaits."

* * *

"Thanks for walking us home." Rory said as she and Jess stepped onto the porch of her house. Jess held a sleeping Trix in his arms.

"Hey, Jess Mariano is a gentleman above all else. Make sure you tell everyone that." He joked in a quiet voice to avoid waking up the baby.

"I would, but no one would believe me." Rory joked back. "Come on in."

She led the way into her house and Jess followed. Once inside, he immediately took Trix into her room, where he gently laid her in her crib and delicately ran his hand over her head. Rory smiled at the gesture and put the diaper bag down on the changing table. She walked over to stand next to Jess and look at her daughter while she slept.

"I can't believe I made that." Rory said reverently.

"You do good work." Jess said approvingly.

"Do you want some tea?" Rory asked, looking up at him.

"Sure."

They sat on the couch with their tea, laughing and talking. There was nothing in her life that Rory was afraid to share with him at this point. She told him about Logan and how his response to finding out Rory was pregnant was to start sending checks, just as she'd known it would be. He was already married to Odette by the time Rory had told him she was pregnant. She'd gone from the 'love of his life' to a mere inconvenience. She wasn't upset or even particularly surprised, but she did hope he'd make time for Trix eventually. She wanted her to know her father better than Rory had known Christopher as a kid.

"Well, if he doesn't then it's his loss." Jess responded after a long, thoughtful silence. "Trixie is going to grow up to be an awesome person. Hell, she already likes hearing me read Hemingway."

Rory narrowed her eyes. "When have you been reading Hemingway to her?"

"Did I say Hemingway? I meant Ayn Rand." Jess smiled, and Rory wrinkled her nose at him, which only made him smile more. Sometimes it still surprised Rory to see Jess smile so easily, but it was becoming more frequent as they spent more time together.

"I can't believe how fast these 6 months have gone." Rory said, leaning her head back and closing her eyes. "I feel like I haven't written anything."

"As always, you're too hard on yourself. You just sent me two more chapters last week. And there's, what? Three more left? You're in the home stretch."

"It's just so hard. By the time she's asleep, all I want to do is sleep too." Rory stretched her legs out, and Jess grabbed her feet and laid them in his lap. Rory smiled at the gesture. This was probably the most comfortable position she could imagine.

"It'll get easier." Jess said. "You're kicking ass at this motherhood thing so far."

"Thanks." Rory murmured. She opened her eyes and saw that Jess was looking at her intently, with affection in his eyes.

"What's that look for?" Rory asked, suddenly feeling very self-conscious.

Jess shrugged and turned his gaze away, looking instead at where his hand rested on Rory's ankles in his lap.

"So serious." Rory said with a little frown, scooting down so she was closer to him. "What's with the brooding face?"

"This is just how my face looks." Jess retorted, turning to look at her again. Rory realized how close she had moved herself to him. Their faces were inches apart.

"It wasn't an insult." Rory reached out tentatively and touched Jess's cheek. "I like how your brooding face looks."

Jess's mouth quirked up and his eyes got darker as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "Do you have any life-changing news to tell me?"

Rory tilted her head in confusion, inadvertently leaning into Jess's touch. "No, I don't think so."

"Not getting back together with Logan? Not pregnant again?" Jess asked seriously as he caressed her cheek.

"No, definitely not." Rory said with a nervous laugh. "Why would you ask that?"

"Because I'm going to kiss you in a second, and I really don't want you drop a bombshell on me after."

Rory didn't get a chance to respond because Jess was true to his word. He gently brushed his lips against hers. Rory was the one who deepened the kiss. She brought both hands to his face and pulled him closer. He moved his hand from her cheek to the back of her neck and Rory leaned into him, electricity humming through her body as he nipped gently on her lower lip.

Jess pulled away and looked at Rory warily, as if still waiting for her to tell him something.

"I do have something important to tell you, actually." She said seriously. She looked at Jess, then swung her body around so she was straddling his lap.

"I want you to kiss me again." Rory said, running her hands through Jess's hair as she brought her mouth down to his.

Jess responded by gripping her hips and kissing her fiercely. Rory let out a little moan as he tightened his grip. He slowly began to slide his hands up her shirt, and Rory stiffened with panic when she thought about him seeing or feeling her stretch marks. She brought her hands down to stop his and hesitantly pulled away, breathless.

Jess smirked and rested his hands back on her hips. Rory pressed her forehead against his and whispered, "That part still works."

Jess laughed lightly and said, "That part was never the problem."

Rory smiled and shifted herself back so she was sitting next to him. Jess immediately wrapped an arm around her and pulled her close to him. She responded by resting her head on his chest, closing her eyes and listening to the gentle thud of his heart.

"I guess I should go." Jess said quietly, trailing his fingers up and down Rory's arm.

Rory quietly contemplated his words, and knew that wasn't what she wanted at all. "You could stay."

"Are you sure?" Jess asked.

"Positive." Rory whispered before falling asleep with her head on Jess's chest.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N:** Happy Blizzard Day to my fellow East Coast-ers! Hope everyone is safe and warm in their houses. Thank you all again for the kind response to this story. Enjoy some fluff before I bring the drama (you didn't think it'd be that easy, did you?)

 **Nine**

Rory awoke to the sound of Trix crying on the baby monitor. She shifted and realized she was in her bed, and that she wasn't alone. Jess wrapped an arm around her midsection and pulled her closer to him.

Rory smiled and said, "I have to get Trix."

"Want me to do it?" He murmured sleepily, and Rory realized how close his mouth was to her ear. She shivered at the feeling of his warm breath tickling her skin.

Rory laughed. "She probably wants to be fed. Are you going to take care of that?"

"Isn't she on bottles now?" Jess asked and Rory was surprised that he remembered that, especially in the middle of the night.

"Not completely. We're getting there. Still doing it the old-fashioned way when she wakes up in the night."

"Well if I could do that, I'd be making a killing at a freak show in Kansas or something." Jess said, hesitantly releasing her from his embrace.

Rory got out of bed and padded next door to Trix's room. She scooped her crying baby out of the crib, and took her over to the rocking chair. She was still in her jeans and button-down shirt. Jess must've carried her from the couch to the bed. She smiled a little at the thought as she undid the buttons on her shirt and the clasp on her nursing bra so Trix could eat.

"Rory? Want some company?" Jess asked, knocking at the door.

"No!" Rory exclaimed, startling Trix so badly that she started to cry. Rory immediately started rocking her back and forth. "Oh, honey, I'm sorry."

"You sure?" Jess asked from the other side of the door.

"I'm sure!" Rory called. She was mortified by the idea of Jess seeing her breastfeed, even though she knew it was absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. "Go back to bed, I'll be there soon."

"Ok…" Jess said, and Rory exhaled noisily in relief. She felt so stupid for worrying so much about her body, but she couldn't stop herself from doing so. She didn't want Jess to think of her breastfeeding, or about what her post-baby body looked like. She knew she wouldn't be what he was expecting, and she wasn't ready for the reality of that to set in for either of them. It was too soon for her to even be thinking about that.

Trix finished eating and immediately fell back asleep. Rory smiled down at her beautiful daughter and put her back into her crib. Rory went through the kitchen to the laundry room and grabbed a pair of knee-length shorts and a baggy t-shirt, which she quickly changed into before heading back to her bedroom.

When she walked in, Jess was sitting up in her bed and reading a book. Rory blushed when she realized he'd taken off his jeans and was only wearing his boxers and a white t-shirt. He looked up at her and gave a crooked smile. "Is she back to sleep?"

"Yep," Rory said with a nod. She lingered in the doorway, watching Jess thoughtfully. He looked so casual and sexy sitting in her bed with a book that she didn't know what to say.

"What's wrong?" Jess asked, his crooked smile fading. He looked down at himself and then back up at her. "Do you want me to put them back on?"

"No." Rory said, slowly shaking her head and breaking out of her trance. "No, don't. I want you to be comfortable."

Jess closed the book he'd been reading and put it on the bedside table. "Then get over here."

"Jess, I…" Rory trailed off, nervous that he thought something was going to happen.

Realization dawned over Jess and his smirk returned. "Afraid I can't resist the Babette Ate Oatmeal t-shirt?"

Rory looked down at her shirt and laughed. She hadn't even realized that was what she'd grabbed. She looked back up at Jess hesitantly.

"Relax, I already told you I'm a gentleman. Still don't believe me?"

Rory matched his smirk with her own and got back into bed. She snuggled up against him and he immediately wrapped his arms around her to pull her closer. Jess brushed a kiss against Rory's forehead and they both drifted off to sleep.

* * *

Rory woke up alone, and wondered if she'd dreamt falling asleep in Jess's arms. It wouldn't be the first time she'd had a dream about him, though they tended to be a bit more risque than just sleeping in the same bed. She looked over at the clock on the table and wrinkled her nose up in confusion. It was after 7 a.m., and Trix never slept past six. Rory sat up in bed and stretched. As she threw on her fuzzy robe, she breathed in the heavenly smell of fresh coffee.

Rory padded into the kitchen and her face split into a grin as she watched Jess maneuver his way around her kitchen. He pulled two mugs from the cupboard while Trix sat in her high chair happily sucking on her bottle.

"Morning." Rory finally announced her presence.

Jess turned. His mouth was in his trademark smirk, but his eyes were bright. He crossed the kitchen and used two fingers to lift her chin. He gave her a short, sweet kiss and said, "Morning. Coffee?"

"Always." Rory said seriously, going over to give Trix a kiss on the top of her head. "Good morning, angel."

"I found one of her bottles in the fridge." Jess said as he poured the coffee. "Wasn't sure what else she's eating."

"We've been trying some strained fruit for breakfast, with varying degrees of success." Rory said, going over to the pantry. "Let's go with...apricots today."

"A fine choice." Jess joked. He stirred a little milk into Rory's coffee and handed it to her. He took the jar of baby food from Rory. "You sit down, I got this."

"You're going to feed my daughter strained apricots?" Rory asked skeptically as she accepted the mug he offered.

"You sound surprised." Jess said, pulling a chair up next to Trix and sitting down. He opened the jar and dipped a purple plastic spoon into it.

Rory didn't answer. She sat down at the kitchen table and watched in awe as Jess brought the spoon to Trix's mouth. She accepted the apricots, but immediately let half the spoonful dribble down her chin. Without a single word or noise of complaint, Jess wiped her chin and tried a second time. This time, the apricots stayed in and Trix opened her mouth for more.

"Jess Mariano feeding my baby. I never thought I'd see the day." Rory teased as she sipped her coffee. "What would the International Order of Teenaged Badasses say if they could see you now?"

"Probably 'why did we give ourselves such a stupid name?'" Jess said, not looking away from the task at hand.

"C'mon, you have to see the humor here." Rory prodded. "You spent a good ten years perfecting your Rebel Without a Cause bit, and it turns out you were just a big old softy the whole time."

Jess finally turned to look at her over his shoulder. "You complaining, Gilmore? Cuz I could just leave."

His voice was joking, but there was a strained edge to it. Rory knew that tone well enough to know not to tease him anymore. "No." Rory said, hoping he could hear the seriousness in her tone. "I don't want you to go anywhere."

His face settled into a soft smile as he looked at her. They shared a quiet moment before Trix let out a small burp, and her last bite of apricots came back up with it. Jess turned to see that her mouth was a mess.

"You eat too fast, Trixie." He said, wiping her face again. "Just like a Gilmore."

"See?" Rory said triumphantly. "I always told you our superhuman eating was genetic."

"What a fool I was to doubt you." Jess said sarcastically. "That's the whole jar, kid. Good job."

"Here," Rory said, pushing herself up from the table. "I'll clean her up, and you drink your coffee."

"Sounds good." Jess said, stepping aside so Rory could undo Trix's harness and lift her out of the high chair. She turned to Jess and gave him a long kiss, which he immediately responded to by putting a hand on her waist and pulling her as close as he could considering she was holding a baby.

They kissed until Trix started to fuss, causing Rory to pull away and look down at her. She kissed her on the head and said, "Always have to be the center of attention."

"See?" Jess teased as he kissed Rory's forehead. "Just like a Gilmore."

Rory made a face at him and pinched his side lightly in retaliation before taking Trix to clean her up.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N:** Thank you as always for the reviews, favorites, and follows. I'm really enjoying writing this story, I hope you're enjoying reading it! Please continue to review, I love hearing everyone's thoughts!

 **Ten**

"Where are my girls?" Lorelai called loudly as she breezed into Rory's house later that day.

"Right here." Rory said from her place on the couch, not looking up from her laptop. "So there's really no need to shout."

"There's my little angel." Lorelai said, ignoring her daughter and scooping Trix up from her pack 'n play. Trix laughed and reached out to cling to her grandmother. "How'd she sleep after the party?"

"Pretty good." Rory said, finishing a sentence and looking up at her mom. "She woke up once in the night. Par for the course."

"So," Lorelai said, sitting next to Rory on the couch with Trix in her lap. "I'm not trying to sound like Ms. Patty here or anything, but I'm going to have to ask why I saw Jess leaving your house at 8:30 this morning."

"No secrets in Stars Hollow." Rory said with a sigh, pinching the bridge of her nose. She closed her laptop and put it on the coffee table before saying, "He spent the night."

Lorelai let out a fake gasp and stage-whispered to Trix, "Mommy's trying to make you a little brother or sister."

"Mom! It wasn't like that. We just...slept." Rory could feel herself smiling. "It was nice. And then this morning he helped me give Trix her breakfast."

"Really?" Lorelai asked, making goofy faces at her granddaughter. She looked at Rory thoughtfully and said, "Interesting."

"Why interesting? And why the serious tone?" Rory asked, confused by her mother's reaction to this news.

"No serious tone." Lorelai said with a shrug, cuddling Trix closer. "Just wondering if you ever talked to him about how he feels about this beautiful little lady."

"No." Rory said, her face twisting in confusion. "But I mean, clearly things have gotten better since he met her. I mean, he's brought her like 20 books and he comes to see us all the time."

"He's good with her." Lorelai agreed. "Not surprising, he was always good with his sisters too. But you were convinced he resented her."

"Before she was born." Rory argued. "And you're the one who pointed out that being confused and hating her weren't the same thing."

"And they're not." Lorelai said, putting Trix back in her pack 'n play and handing her a teddy bear. She turned to give Rory her full attention. "That's not my point."

"Then what is your point, mom?" Rory asked, standing up and facing her mother. She could hear the exasperation in her own voice.

"My point is that the situation is complicated. And Jess clearly had conflicting feelings about being with you now that you have a kid. Doesn't it seem like, I don't know, he's...overcorrecting a little?"

"Overcorrecting? So what, you're saying his feelings haven't changed? He's just faking it to get in my pants or something? I thought you liked him now!" Rory was practically yelling, which caused Trix to drop her teddy bear and look up at her mother and grandmother with big blue eyes.

"I do like him!" Lorelai's voice raised as well. "All I'm trying to say is maybe, before you start inviting him to stay over, you should ask him how he actually feels about the whole situation! If he understands what it means to date a woman with a baby and if he's ready for it. And I would like us to just acknowledge that we apparently live in some crazy universe where I now care about Jess's feelings!"

"I acknowledge it!"

"Thank you!"

All the yelling got to be too much for Trix at this point and she began to cry. Lorelai and Rory immediately stopped and Rory scooped her daughter up to comfort her. Lorelai put a hand on Rory's shoulder and cooed calming words to Trix as Rory rocked her back and forth.

"You're right." Rory said calmly. "It is complicated. But if I don't ask him about it…"

"You can pretend it's not." Lorelai finished for her, matching her calm tone. "I get it. But kid, that's not fair to you, him, or Trix."

Rory frowned and didn't answer. She just looked down at Trix, who had stuck her fingers in her mouth and was looking up at them.

"Do you remember when Jess first showed up when you were a teenager?" Lorelai asked, changing tactics. She led Rory over to the couch and they both sat while Rory continued to rock Trix in her arms.

"What about it?" Rory wrinkled her nose in confusion.

"How hard you tried to convince yourself that you didn't like him, that you were happy with Dean? Even back then, you were afraid of things getting complicated with Jess. And it turned into a brutal two years for everyone involved. I know it's not the same, but do you get what I'm saying?" Lorelai asked.

"You're saying I need to suck it up and talk to him, even though I might not like the answer." Rory responded with a frown.

"She can be taught!" Lorelai teased. She made a face at Trix, who giggled in response.

"Just so we're clear, I hate it when you're right." Rory said with a sigh.

"Take a number. Luke's been saying that for years."

* * *

Rory rapped on the door to the apartment above the diner, but she knew it was futile. She could barely hear herself think over the blaring sounds of Rancid coming from inside, so she couldn't imagine that Jess could hear her knocking. She tried the knob and found it unlocked. She quietly stepped inside and closed the door behind her.

Jess was on the couch with his back to the door, writing quickly in a plain black notebook. Rory smiled as she watched him. He never used a computer to write until absolutely necessary. He took comfort in the noise the pen made when it moved across the paper, and he liked that any mistakes he made couldn't be deleted like they'd never existed. "That's not how life works, it isn't how writing should work either," he had told her once.

After a few moments of watching him, Rory walked over to the kitchen counter and pressed pause on the CD player, causing Jess to sit straight up and look over at her. His eyes widened in surprise, but his mouth curled into his trademark smirk and he made no effort to stand.

"Hey."

"Hey yourself." Rory said with a nervous smile. "Can't believe you're still listening to CDs."

"You should see my vinyl collection." He retorted. "Where's Trix?"

"My mom's got her." Rory said, leaning against the counter even though her instinct was to go over and be as close to him as possible. "What are you writing?"

"Who knows?" He lifted one shoulder in a shrug. "Just fragments right now, we'll see what it turns into."

"Cool. When are you heading back to Philadelphia?" Rory winced. She couldn't believe she was standing there making small talk instead of just talking to him about the reason she was here.

"Tomorrow." Jess closed his notebook and looked at her thoughtfully. "I was going to come see you before I left."

"I know!" Rory said, her voice raising an octave. "I didn't think-, that's not why I'm here."

Jess smirked but it was tight and the humor was gone from his eyes. "I mean, if you came here to make out, I'm more than ok with that. But your posture is kinda stiff and your voice just did that squeaky thing it does when you're nervous, so I figured this wasn't just a social call."

Rory crossed her arms in front of her chest in a defensive stance and said, "I need to ask you a question."

"Ok." Jess said immediately, leaning forward and looking Rory straight in the eyes. "Ask."

Rory shifted uncomfortably under his gaze but finally asked, "How do you feel about Trix?"

Jess blinked and covered his mouth with his hands as he contemplated the question. Finally he said, "She's a good baby, and you're an amazing mom."

"Thank you." Rory said sincerely, "But that wasn't what I meant."

"I know." Jess said, nodding. He flashed a self-deprecating smile. "Can't blame a guy for trying, can you?"

"Jess-."

"It was really hard for me when I found out you were pregnant." Jess cut her off, speaking much quicker than he normally did, a sure sign that he was uncomfortable. "Which is selfish, but it's me so that shouldn't surprise you. I thought things were going good with me and you, and all of a sudden here's a brand new reason why it isn't going to work out."

"Jess-." Rory started again, but he kept talking.

"I mean, how many times did you run back to that asshole, no matter what he did? And there you were, pregnant with his kid. I'm not a fucking place-holder, just hanging out until Richie Rich is ready to be a dad."

Rory could feel tears welling in her eyes as Jess's voice got angry. "Did I do something to make you feel like that?"

"Recently? No." Jess finally stood. "But do you want me to list all the times it's happened in the past?"

"Don't." Rory shook her head. "So all this talk about us forgiving each other and moving past all the old drama, that was bullshit?"

"No. Absolutely not." Jess insisted firmly. "But forgiving and forgetting are two completely different things."

"So do you still feel like that?" Rory asked. "Like you're...waiting for me to go back to Logan? After everything we've talked about recently?"

Jess sighed. "It's...I don't know. Things have been going good, but...I guess I'm still waiting for the other shoe to drop."

"Then what's this been the last few months, with all the visits and the gifts for Trix? And what was last night and this morning?"

Jess lifted his shoulders in a shrug. "I guess I just thought if I pretended I didn't feel this way, I'd get over it eventually. So that's what I've been trying to do. Do you think I like feeling like this when all I've ever wanted is to be with you?"

"So you overcorrected." Rory nodded, the tears dripping down her face.

Jess shot her a strange look and he tilted his head at the statement. "Yeah. I guess I did. Jeez, you sound just like your mom."

Rory's head shot up at that. "You've talked to my _mother_ about this?"

"I've talked to Luke about this." Jess corrected. "Your mom just loves to eavesdrop and offer unsolicited advice."

"No wonder she's been so on-point." Rory said sarcastically. "So what does this mean? You really do hate Trix?"

"Of course I don't hate Trix!" Jess exclaimed, exasperated. "I'm sorry you ever thought that. She's all the most amazing parts of you, how could I ever hate her? I just...I don't know how I fit into your life now, Rory. I don't know what I am to you, what I am to Trix. And while I know exactly what I want to be to you, I don't know what I want to be to your daughter."

Rory took in a long, shaky breath. "Me and you, we care about each other, right?"

"Right." Jess agreed immediately.

"And Trix? Do you care about her?"

"I…" Jess hesitated but nodded and said, "I do."

"Then isn't that enough?"

Jess was silent for so long that Rory thought he wasn't going to answer. Finally he said, "I don't know."

Rory nodded solemnly. "Well I hope you figure it out, because I don't have time for anyone in my life who doesn't 100% want to be there. And I don't need someone like that around my daughter. But let me make something perfectly clear."

Rory closed the space between her and Jess and put a hand on each side of his face. "There's no other shoe, but there is me and Trix. We're a package. You're either in or you're out."

Without another word, Rory walked out of the apartment and deliberately slammed the door behind her.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N:** As always, thank you times a million for reading. I'm having a great time writing this. Let me know what you think!

 **Eleven**

"How long has it been since you've seen him?" Lane asked her best friend as they watched Steve, Kwan, and Trix.

Rory and Lane were sitting on the couch in Rory's living room while the boys were on the floor playing video games. They had played with Trix all of 5 minutes before they got bored and now they were playing with their Nintendo Switch. Occasionally one would reach over and shove the other, then they'd go back playing. Trix was sitting on the floor, happily banging two rubber blocks together.

"Three weeks." Rory said with a sigh. "Guess that settles that, huh?"

"Hey, you did the right thing. Being a mom is absolutely everything. You want someone who loves your daughter as much as you do, not just tolerates her." Lane said, putting a hand on Rory's shoulder.

Rory covered her face with her hands. "I know, I know. I just...miss him."

Lane shrugged. "Maybe he'll come around. Kwan, get your finger out of your brother's nose!"

Rory laughed as Lane's sons separated from each other. "You've got that mom voice down."

"You don't grow up with Mrs. Kim without learning a trick or two." Lane joked. "You've probably got it in you too, just wait til you have to use it."

"I don't even blame him, Lane. Really, I don't. He's not her father. He's not even my boyfriend, how can I expect him to be willing to make any kind of commitment to me and Trix?"

Lane quietly contemplated that question while she watched her boys play, a small smile on her face. "Jess doesn't do anything halfway when it comes to you. He never has. He might be scared, but he's loved you since we were 17. He's not going to let you go that easily."

Rory rested her head on Lane's shoulder. "Motherhood has made you very zen, Lane Kim Van Gerbig."

"Hold that thought." Lane said, patting Rory's head and standing up. "Steve, let go of Kwan! If you're going to act like animals, drop the game and go play outside!"

Lane's sons scurried to do as they were told and Lane bent over and picked up Trix before sitting back down with the baby in her lap. "They're exhausting. I'm so jealous you have a daughter."

"You're actually my hero." Rory said reverently. "The fact that you deal with two 13-year-old boys every day is nothing short of a miracle."

Rory's cell phone began to ring and she looked down at it, surprised to see Jess's name on the screen for the first time in almost a month.

"It's Jess...FaceTiming me." Rory wasn't sure if she was more shocked to hear from Jess or that he had finally got a smartphone.

"Well, answer it!" Lane said encouragingly.

Rory pressed the button and held the phone in front of her. She waited until Jess' face appeared on the screen and said, "Hi."

"I never should've bought this damn thing." Jess was grumbling. "Am I doing this right?"

Rory chuckled in spite of herself as she saw how close his face was to the screen. "Hold the phone back a little."

Jess did as directed and said, "That's better. Hey."

"Hey. I can't believe you finally caved and got a smartphone." Rory said.

"Stupidest thing I ever did." Jess said. "Matt kept going on about how much more work I'd get done. I hate it. Can you see me ok?"

"I can see you fine. Can you see me and Lane?"

"Yeah. Hey Lane, hey Trixie." Jess said, giving a small wave to the baby. She giggled and started to reach for the phone.

"Hey Jess. Welcome to the 21st century. I'm gonna get Trix a snack." Lane said before standing and taking Trix into the kitchen.

Rory waited until Lane was out of earshot before looking back at Jess on the screen. "So what's up?"

Jess hesitated and said, "So, I did something. And I'm not sure how you're going to feel about it."

"Ok…" Rory said. "You're making me nervous."

"You remember Chris, right? My old partner?"

"Of course I do."

"He left to go to Random House, and he's actually working for Ballantine Books. It's one of their imprints. Have you heard of it?" Jess asked.

"Yeah…" Rory said, her voice cracking as she tried to put together what he was saying.

"I sent him some excerpts of your book."

Rory dropped the phone into her lap and stared blankly ahead.

"Rory? Rory, I'm looking at your ceiling right now. There's a huge crack. How has Luke not noticed that?" Jess's voice was still coming from the phone.

"He's fixing it next week." Rory said dumbly.

"Ror? Could you maybe pick up the phone and look at me?"

Rory silently acquiesced, holding the phone back up and noting that even over the phone connection, she could see the uncertainty written all over his face. He was nervous about what he had done.

"Ok." Rory said, taking a deep breath and steadying herself. "I think I've processed that now. You sent Chris pages from my book."

"I did." Jess agreed.

"Without my permission." Rory stated matter-of-factly, staring at his face on the screen.

"Also correct. Are you angry?"

"Yes, I think I am." Rory said with a nod, though her voice remained calm. "But I also want to know what he thought, so I guess let's start with that."

Jess's face relaxed just a little at that statement and he said, "He wants to have a meeting with you. He's actually coming to Truncheon next week to meet with me on some other stuff. Could you come to Philadelphia?"

* * *

"Rory Gilmore!" Chris Saunders called loudly as Rory walked into Truncheon. He dropped the book he was holding and rushed over to hug her before she was even out of the doorway. "Ballantine Books' next up-and-coming author!"

"Hi Chris." Rory said, tentatively returning the hug. Her grandfather had taught her that every productive business meeting started with a firm handshake, but Chris clearly didn't subscribe to that school of thought.

Chris pulled back and Rory saw he was wearing jeans and a Rolling Stones t-shirt. She immediately felt stupid for going out and buying a new power outfit. The red dress didn't work since her mother had shattered her illusions about it, and it was also a size too small these days. The belted navy sheath dress she had chosen as a replacement made her feel good, but looking at Chris she also felt way overdressed.

"You look great!" Chris said. "Motherhood agrees with you. Congratulations on your daughter, Jess has told me a lot about her."

"Has he?" Rory said, feeling uncomfortable. "Well, thank you. And congratulations to you, I hear things are going well in New York."

"Surprisingly well." Chris said cheerfully, wrapping an arm around Rory's shoulders and finally moving away from the door.

"You can say that again." Matt chimed in, coming out from around the corner. "We had a pool going, and no one had him lasting longer than 6 months."

"Hi Matt." Rory said with a smile, letting him hug her as well. Their affectionate nature must have been wasted by having Jess as a best friend. Even as she thought it, she knew it wasn't entirely true. Jess was completely capable of showing affection when he wanted. Rory shook her head. She was here to think about her book, not about Jess.

"Well don't let me keep you guys from your very important meeting." Matt said brightly, releasing her from his hug. "Rory, I hope you'll come for lunch with us after. But I guess that depends on how the meeting goes, huh? Cuz if it goes bad then you won't want to eat with Chris. So I'll ask again when you're done. Sorry I'm rambling, I'm just excited!"

Rory laughed and patted his shoulder. "Thanks, Matt."

"C'mon, Jess said we could use his office while he and Cecilia are back running the presses." Chris said. Rory immediately felt the sharp pang of jealousy in her stomach at Cecilia's name. She wondered if that would ever go away. More than that, she wondered if Jess was fooling around with her again, which just fanned the flames.

Chris and Rory walked back to Jess's office and Chris immediately threw himself onto the couch, motioning for Rory to take the chair across from him.

"I love _Gilmore Girls_ , Rory." Chris said as soon as Rory was sitting and facing him. "I've read hundreds of manuscripts and I've never had a reaction like this. I had no idea how fascinating your life has been. It makes for a really dynamic book."

"Thank you." Rory said, her throat feeling dry.

"I brought it to the head of my department. I asked him to sign you to a full book deal."

"What?" Rory asked, her heart practically bursting with joy. "Are you serious?"

Chris held up his hands, guilt on his features. "Sorry, I shouldn't have paused there. He didn't go for that."

"Oh." Rory said, her hopes falling and her face turning red. It served her right for getting excited.

"He said no because you're an unknown in the book world, Rory. And because we've never published anything like _Gilmore Girls_ before. But he liked what he read, and he's willing to do a limited release to see how it does."

"What does that mean? Limited release?" Rory thought she was pretty well-versed in publishing, but had never heard the term in this context.

"It means we'll cover the costs for the production of the book, but we won't throw full backing behind distribution and publicity. That'd be up to you. If it does well, we'd then consider doing a full deal."

"How many would we print?" Rory asked.

"Well," Chris said, his face splitting into a smile, "That depends on the printers."

The door to the office swung open and Jess walked in, wiping ink from his hands onto a rag. "Hey."

"Hey." Rory said, nervously. She thought about getting up to hug him like she had Matt and Chris, but decided she was still angry with him for too many reasons.

"Well speak of the devil." Chris said, still wearing that bright grin. "How many copies of _Gilmore Girls_ could we print?"

"We can start with a run of 500." Jess said, his eyes lighting up with amusement.

"What?" Rory yelped, jumping up and turning to face Jess. "Truncheon's going to print it?"

Jess was smirking as he looked at her. "I told you I wanted it, Gilmore. Did you think I was lying?"

Rory and Jess shared a charged look before Rory turned back to Chris. "That's why you wanted to meet here in Philly, isn't it? Because you already knew Truncheon was going to print it."

Chris smiled. "Guilty as charged. It's a perfect fit. No one knows more about self-distribution than these guys. And we've already done a few small contracts with them for overflow printing, so it wasn't a hard sell with the bosses."

Rory took a deep breath and said, "Thank you, Chris, for taking this chance on me. I'm interested. I'm very interested. Can you send me a contract? I want my attorney to review it."

"Of course." Chris said, pulling out his phone. "I actually have one drawn up already. I'll e-mail it to you right now."

"Paris is going to rip that thing to shreds, man. Hope your legal department is ready." Jess said, still smirking.

Rory couldn't help but smile at Jess, no matter how awkward everything was between them.

"Chris, could you give me and Rory a few minutes?" Jess asked his old friend.

"Sure." Chris said, still staring at his phone. "I'll go fight with Matt about where we should get lunch."

Chris walked out and Jess crossed the room to Rory.

"Scale of 1 to 10, how mad are you?" Jess asked, still holding the ink-stained rag in his hands.

"For giving Chris my book without asking me first? I'd say about a 5. For not hearing from you in a month? 10ish. Maybe 11." Rory answered honestly.

Jess opened his mouth to respond but Rory tackled him in a hug before he could. Jess laughed and held his hands away from Rory's dress. "I'm covered in ink."

"I don't care." Rory said, but she immediately pushed away from him. "Yes I do, this is a new dress."

"It looks great." Jess said, clearing his throat. "Power outfit?"

"Every girl needs one." Rory said with a nod.

"I'm sorry, Rory. I'm sorry I didn't call earlier. And I'm not sorry I gave Chris your book but I am sorry I didn't get your permission." Jess said, tossing the rag on his desk.

"I'm sorry too." Rory said. "I had no right to expect you to call after the way we left things."

"Don't." Jess cut her off. "Don't blame yourself for the fact I didn't call. I should've called. God, it's like 2003 all over again."

Rory laughed lightly at that. "Thank you for giving my book to Chris. I know exactly why you didn't tell me, because I would've told you not to do it. But I'm so glad you did. I wrote a book. And it's good."

"I've been telling you that for over a year." Jess said, his expression soft. "Glad you finally realized it."

"You really believed in me this whole time, even after we fought." Rory said, amazed.

"It wasn't really a fight, Ror. You were right about everything. It wasn't fair to anyone for me to pretend I was ready to be in Trix's life."

"I wish you would've just told me." Rory said quietly.

"They verbal thing comes and goes." They said it at the same time. They both laughed and Jess shrugged sheepishly.

"I know I didn't try hard enough when we were together. I wanted to do better by you now. But I know you need all or nothing, and I just...I don't want to fuck up your whole life again by not being what you need."

Rory took in a shaky breath and nodded. "I get it. Really, I do. Can we...be friends?"

Jess looked at her thoughtfully, cocking his head to the side. Finally, he smiled "We can try. Want to start with lunch with me and the Hardy Boys?"

"Have I ever turned down food? I'm in."

They walked out of Jess's office and Rory put a hand on Jess's shoulder.

"And can I please send you the last two chapters of the book now? I hate that you haven't seen them yet."

Jess laughed, "I have my red pen ready and waiting, Gilmore."


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N:** This is probably my favorite chapter that I've written in this fic so far. I hope you all like it. Thanks as always for reading and reviewing!

 **Twelve**

"Let me see it, let me see it!" Lorelai exclaimed, bursting into Rory's house. Rory was on the floor with Trix. Trix was on her feet, balancing precariously while Rory held her by the hands. Rory looked up at her mom with a smile. "Not bad for 11 months old, huh?"

"Aww, my little angel is going to be walking on her own any day now." Lorelai cooed. "Let me see it!"

Rory rolled her eyes and stood, lifting Trix up with her. Trix's toddling was still new, but it wasn't what Lorelai meant. Chris had sent over the mock-up for the book jacket earlier in the day.

She led the way into the kitchen, where the mock-up sat on the table. She placed Trix in her high chair while her mother inspected the cover art for her book. She took out a pureed fruit pouch, removed the top, and gave it to Trix. Trix took it from her eagerly and started slurping her pureed strawberries and bananas.

"What do you think?" Rory asked nervously, looking over at her mom. She hadn't said anything yet.

Lorelai looked over at Rory and there were tears in her eyes. The front cover was actually a photo of a photograph. Specifically, it was a picture of the mantle in Lorelai's living room. Sitting directly in the middle of the mantle was a framed photograph of Lorelai and Rory during Rory's 16th birthday party. Rory had on her birthday crown and feather boa, and Lorelai was flanking her with a proud, beautiful smile on her face.

"Oh, kid." Lorelai said, a tear spilling over. "It's amazing."

She wrapped her daughter in a tight hug and tried to fight back more tears. "When did you take that picture?"

"Luke let us come in and stage the photograph a few weeks ago while you were at the inn. I was convinced he was going to spill the beans." Rory said, her own eyes filling with tears.

"I knew he was hiding something but I figured he was just sneaking vegetables into my dinner again."

Lorelai pulled back and held her daughter at arm's length. "The cover is amazing. The book is amazing. I am so ridiculously proud of you."

"Thanks, mom." Rory said, her lip quivering as tears fell.

"Hi!." Trix said from her high chair, causing Lorelai and Rory to start laughing.

"I take it she's still not saying anything else." Lorelai said, going over and kissing the top of Trix's head.

"Nope." Rory shook her head. "We get a lot of random syllables but that's the only actual word so far."

Lorelai smiled and said, "Just wait. It's not long from first words to first sentences to first published book."

"Don't even say that. I can't believe I'm already planning her first birthday party. Every time Sookie texts me another cake suggestion, I start to cry."

"You know those aren't suggestions, right? Trix is going to end up with at least six birthday cakes." Lorelai said, running her hand over Trix's blonde hair.

Rory smiled and said, "I wouldn't have it any other way."

"Hi!" Trix exclaimed again, following it with a giggle.

Rory smiled at her daughter. When she looked up, she saw that Lorelai was smiling down at her with tears in her eyes.

"Mom, stop!" Rory said, her own eyes filling with tears.

"Sorry, I'm sorry!" Lorelai exclaimed, pulling Rory into another hug. "I'm just so happy."

The doorbell rang and Rory pulled away from her mom. "Saved by the bell from my crazy mother."

"A temporary reprieve." Lorelai called after her as Rory went to answer the door. "But you will never truly be safe!"

Rory was laughing as she opened the front door to see Jess standing there, his messenger bag slung over his shoulder.

"Hey!" Rory exclaimed happily, moving aside to let him in the house. "I didn't know you were coming to Stars Hollow this weekend."

"I didn't know I was until this morning." Jess smiled at her as he walked past her.

Rory and Jess had kept their agreement and remained friends after their attempt to be something more had failed so spectacularly. They had gone back to the way it was before that. They texted and called, Jess stopped by and he was still wonderful with Trix but there was no pressure and no expectations, which made for a much calmer atmosphere. It wasn't seamless, and there were definitely some awkward silences in those phone calls. But Jess had become such a strong, calming presence in her life and having him as a friend was definitely better than those three weeks when they weren't talking at all.

"Well I'm glad you're here." Rory said, returning his smile.

"Yeah?" Jess asked, and the electricity between them was palpable.

"Yeah." Rory said quietly, her cheeks warming. "Chris sent over the mock-up for the book jacket. Have you seen it yet?"

"No, I haven't. I heard it's awesome though."

"It's _so_ awesome." Rory gushed, grabbing his hand and leading him to the kitchen. "Come see."

Jess let Rory lead him to the kitchen, where Lorelai was sitting with Trix in her lap while Trix ate some dry Cheerios that Lorelai had spread onto the table.

"Hey, Jess." Lorelai said, smiling. She looked down at Rory and Jess's joined hands and raised an eyebrow. Rory's cheeks warmed again and she dropped Jess's hand. Trix looked up and saw Jess standing there. She immediately reached out to be picked up, calling to him in her nonsense syllables.

"Hey, Lorelai. Hey Trixie." Jess said, going over and picking up Trix, who immediately wrapped her little arms around his neck.

"Have you seen this yet?" Lorelai asked, handing Jess the cover art. He adjusted Trix so he was holding her with one arm and took the offered page with his other hand.

"Wow." He said, nodding his head to show his approval. "This looks fantastic. It's a perfect fit for the book."

"Just like you knew it would be." Rory said, smiling up at him. "It was Jess's idea, mom."

Jess shrugged and put the page down. "It was just a suggestion."

"Well it was a good one." Lorelai said, putting a hand on Jess's shoulder. "Who knew you could actually be useful?"

"I'm going to remind you of that the next time Luke wants help cleaning out the basement." Jess retorted. Trix took that opportunity to put her hand on Jess's cheek, and he responded with a smile and a kiss on her forehead. Rory's heart constricted at the sight, even though she wished it wouldn't.

"You don't fight fair." Lorelai said with a pout. Jess smirked and made a face at her. Rory laughed. She loved watching their good-natured bickering.

"So what brings you to Stars Hollow today, bane of my existence?" Lorelai asked, reaching out and taking Trix from Jess's arms.

"Well, since it's a day for exciting book news…" Jess smiled and put his messenger bag on the table. "I've got the final copy for you to review before we take it to print."

"That's amazing!" Rory exclaimed, snatching the manuscript from his hands. "Including the last round of edits?"

"Yeah." Jess said. "And it's been proofed twice. Just needs your final ok and we're good to go."

"Wow, big day!" Lorelai exclaimed, her eyes filling with tears again.

"Mom, not again." Rory chastised, but only because she could feel her own tears forming.

"Alright, if you're over a year old, I'm going to need you to not start crying." Jess said, taking a step back from the two emotional Gilmore girls.

"You're right, you're right. Leave the crying to the baby." Lorelai said, kissing Trix and making her laugh. "How about I take Trix over with my house for some grandma time and you two book nerds can talk shop?"

Rory furrowed her brow, knowing that her mother was just trying to meddle. She had firmly told Rory on multiple occasions that she thought Jess and Rory were being ridiculous about this whole thing.

"Thanks, Lorelai." Jess said, before Rory could protest. Lorelai smiled triumphantly at her daughter before getting Trix ready and hurrying out of the house with her.

"Thanks for bringing this over, Jess." Rory said, settling down on the couch after her mother had left. "You could've just e-mailed it."

"And miss the look on your face seeing you hold the actual manuscript in your hand? Never." Jess said. He sat down in the armchair across from her. He never sat next to her anymore. It was one of the biggest differences now that they were 'just friends.'

""I can't believe this is happening." Rory said. "I can't believe it's real."

"It's real." Jess said. "Matt has been in a frenzy getting all our contacts to stock your book. It's going pretty well."

"I know." Rory said, excited. "I've been going to bookstores around here myself, and doing Skype and Facetime meetings with some others. The leads you and Matt gave me have been really helpful. And Chris has been making a lot of introductions for me on his own time."

"We believe in you." Jess said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"I know." Rory said reverently. "But you've been so busy with my book, when are you working on yours?"

Jess looked at her suspiciously. "Who squealed, Matt or Chris? Matt, right? Of course it was Matt."

"It was totally Matt." Rory said, laughing. "Jess, why didn't _you_ tell me?"

Jess shrugged. "There's not much to tell yet. I'm still putting together the first draft. I'll send it to you when it's passable."

"What's it about?" Rory asked. "Do I at least get to know that much?"

"Life. Loss. Redemption. The usual. It probably sucks."

Rory shook her head vehemently. "No. That's not even possible. Everything you write is amazing."

"Put away the pom-poms, Courtney." Jess teased with a soft smile.

Rory laughed loudly and said, "Sorry, pal, that reference doesn't make sense anymore. You're way less Kurt Cobain-y than you used to be."

"Keep that to yourself. I have a reputation to maintain."

"Jess, I'm serious. Do you really not know how good you are?" Rory asked, dumbfounded by the possibility.

"Rory, stop." Jess said dismissively. "I don't want to talk about this."

"I will not stop." Rory said insistently, putting on her most determined face. She stood up and stalked to Trix's room, where she snatched a book from the shelves and walked back to the living room.

"What's that?" Jess asked skeptically.

Rory didn't answer. She was thumbing through the pages to find the passage she was looking for, the passage she had underlined and reread a thousand times. She glared at Jess before reading out loud:

"So here's the thing about being alone- sometimes you go days, weeks, months without realizing that you are. You walk through your days and think that everything's going your way. Maybe it is, maybe it isn't. But the point is that you don't go around chanting 'something's missing, something's missing, something's missing.' It's just a feeling that comes over you suddenly, sometimes for no reason at all. A moment when you realize that whatever burden it is that you bear, you're carrying it alone. But it's actually kind of funny. No matter how heavy that feeling gets, no matter how easy it is to get stuck in your own head and truly believe it's you versus the world, here's the other thing about being alone- you're not. I promise you, you're not."

Rory looked to Jess solemnly. She closed the book, her worn copy of _Brittle_ _Broken Bones_ , Jess's second novel. She threw it at him and said, "The next time you want to doubt yourself, mister, remember that those words got me through some of the hardest times in my life."

Jess silently picked up his book and quietly flipped through it, and Rory knew he was looking at the notes she'd made all over it. He closed the book and stood, handing it back to her. "Thanks."

"You're welcome." Rory said quietly, cheeks warming under Jess's intense gaze. "No one else writes like you, Jess-."

Jess reached out and clapped a hand over Rory's mouth before she could finish her sentence.

"OK, official moratorium on the pom-poms. I get it." Jess said, smiling at her. He gently moved his hand from Rory's mouth to her cheek. He left his hand there for just a moment, the heat of him feeling like it was going to scorch her skin.

"I promise you'll be the first person to see the draft when it's ready." Jess said, slowly dropping his hand from her face.

"Thank you. And if you stop with the self-deprecation about your writing, I'll stop with the pom-poms. Deal?"

"To be fair, I wasn't really being-."

"Do you want me to read another passage?" Rory asked, making a show of opening the book again.

Jess put a hand over hers to stop her from doing so and let his fingers linger over hers as he said, "Fine. You've got a deal."

"Good." Rory said. "Coffee?"

"Coffee." Jess agreed, dropping his hand from hers as they both moved towards the kitchen.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N:** *taps glass* Is anyone still out there? Sorry for the delay in updating. I've been dealing with a family emergency that unfortunately hasn't gotten any better. Good thoughts and prayers are welcome. Anyway, I decided getting a new chapter out would take my mind off things. Enjoy, and please let me know what you think!

 **Thirteen**

"Please answer, please answer." Rory mumbled through her tears as her mother's phone went straight to voicemail again. She knew that Lorelai and Luke were on the ferry to Nantucket right now and that neither of them had reception, but it hadn't stopped her from calling eight times as she sat in the hospital with Trix.

Trix had cried herself out waiting for the doctor. Multiple nurses had been in to assure them that he would be in shortly to put in the stitches, but it had been almost an hour. There had been some sort of car accident that had taken priority, leaving Rory and Trix alone waiting in an exam room for his return.

Rory cursed herself again for her carelessness as she looked over to where Trix lay quietly on the exam table, her fingers shoved in her mouth and unshed tears glistening in her eyes.

"I'm so sorry, baby." Rory whispered. Her phone beeped and she looked down at it eagerly. It wasn't her mother. It was Jess, asking if she'd heard some new song by Cold War Kids. Rory didn't text him back. Without even thinking, she pressed the button to call him.

"Hey." Jess said, answering after the first ring. Rory could hear the smile in his voice and it completely broke her.

"Jess." Rory sobbed into the phone, the tears falling faster as she spoke.

"What's wrong?" Jess asked. His tone changed immediately at the sound of her crying.

Rory couldn't answer right away. Her chest was constricting as the tears fell faster. She took several gulps of air and was finally able to get out, "Trix...hospital."

She heard Jess suck in a breath like he'd been punched in the stomach. "Where are you? Hartford General?"

"Yeah." Rory choked out.

"Ok." Jess said, his voice dead calm. "Ok, has she been admitted?"

Rory nodded. After a moment, Jess sighed and asked, "Are you nodding? I can't see you if you're nodding."

"Yeah." Rory repeated "She...stitches...tests."

"I'll be there in three hours." Jess said firmly, leaving no room for discussion. His voice turned soft and soothing as he said, "Everything will be alright, Rory."

He hung up before Rory could say anything. She dumbly put her phone down and looked over at her daughter, who was still quietly sucking on her fingers.

"I'm sorry, angel." Rory said, reaching over and gently stroking Trix's arm. Trix pulled her fingers out of her mouth long enough to say, "Ok, mama."

Rory managed a laugh through her tears. Trix was 15 months old now and while she didn't say a lot yet, she was learning new words every day.

Trix brought her hand up to the bandage on her head but Rory caught her before she could touch it. "No, baby. We have to wait for the doctor."

"Ok, mama." Trix repeated. She reached out for Rory, who gently scooped her into her arms and cuddled her while they waited for the doctor.

* * *

Two and a half hours later, Trix was sleeping peacefully in her hospital bed, which had high sides so she couldn't climb out of it. The doctor had finally come and put 4 stitches in the gash on her forehead, before whisking her off for an X-ray and a CAT scan. This was all apparently routine for a toddler with a head injury. All the excitement had worn Trix out, and she'd fallen asleep almost immediately. Rory gently held her daughter's hand while she slept, her eyes actually sore and exhausted from all the crying she'd done.

Rory was starting to doze off herself when she thought she heard someone say her name in the hallway of the pediatrics wing.

"Lorelai Gilmore." She heard Jess's voice and stood, confused as to how he'd gotten there so fast. Rory walked over to the door of the room and saw Jess at the nurses' station, looking unbelievably frustrated.

"Is that the child's name or the mother's?" The nurse asked as she typed something into the computer.

"Both." Jess responded immediately, impatiently drumming his fingers on the counter.

"Ok, she is admitted here but visiting hours ended an hour ago." The nurse said, glancing up at him. "Immediate family only."

"He's family!" Rory exclaimed, rushing out of the room and grabbing Jess's hand. "He's absolutely family."

Before the nurse could even respond, Rory had dragged Jess into Trix's room. He immediately wrapped his arms around her, holding her tightly to his chest. Rory sniffed, but there were no more tears. She clung to Jess, hiding her face in the crook of his neck as he gently stroked her hair.

"You got here so fast." Rory observed. She was still holding on to Jess, inhaling his scent and melting into him.

"Would've been faster but I got pulled over twice." Jess murmured.

"You didn't!" Rory exclaimed, finally pulling back far enough to look at him. His smile was sheepish.

"First cop let me go, second gave me a ticket." He shrugged and looked over at Trix, who was still sleeping. "I'm not complaining."

He walked over to Trix's bedside and sat down, running a finger over her cheek. "What happened?"

Rory sighed and looked at the bandage covering the stitches on Trix's forehead. "We were playing in the living room and my phone rang in the kitchen. I was only gone for 30 seconds."

Jess nodded. "She hit her head on the coffee table."

"How'd you know?" Rory asked pathetically.

He smirked. "All three of my sisters did it. Pretty sure I did too when I was a kid. Rite of passage. She's ok though?"

Rory nodded. "Six stitches. They did a CAT scan and an X-ray. They both came back fine. But she has to stay overnight for observation. It's protocol or whatever."

"Poor kid." Jess said, touching her cheek again before standing and going over to Rory. "Poor you."

"It was terrible, Jess." Rory said, her lip trembling. "She was crying and bleeding and I didn't know what to do."

"Well that last part isn't true." Jess said, reaching out and placing a comforting hand on her shoulder. "You brought her to the hospital. Pretty sure that's the exact right thing to do."

"Stop being so logical." Rory said with a pout, leaning her head against Jess's shoulder.

"Sorry." Jess said with a laugh, wrapping his arm around her and pulling her tighter to him.

"I'm so glad you're here." Rory said honestly. "It's just been so much. The stitches and the tests and that woman from DCF…"

"Wait, what?" Jess asked, pulling away to look at Rory. "They sent a social worker here?"

Rory nodded and tried to wave it off. "Another protocol. They have to rule out child abuse."

"That's fucking bullshit." Jess growled. "How could anyone think you abuse her? You're the best mother I know. Don't they have real problems to deal with? What'd they say? Are they coming back because I swear to God-"

Rory placed a hand on Jess's arm and felt how tense he was. She shook her head with a small smile and said, "We're fine. She was just doing her job. They know it was just an accident."

"Good." Jess said, his jaw still clenched so tightly that Rory could see a muscle popping in his neck.

"Weren't you supposed to be calming me down?" Rory asked, smiling gently at him.

Jess exhaled a long breath and Rory could see he was actively trying to relax. "Did you get a hold of Lorelai and Luke? Wasn't this weekend their trip to Nantucket?"

Rory nodded. "They were on the ferry when I called, so they didn't get my message right away. I told mom they should stay and enjoy the weekend with my grandma."

"So there's a 50% chance they're coming back?" Jess asked.

"More like 75%." Rory said with a smile. "It won't be til tomorrow though. The last ferry was already gone for the night."

Jess wandered back over to watch Trix sleep. Rory could see the worried, affectionate look on his face as he pushed her blonde hair off her forehead, carefully avoiding the area around the gash.

"You didn't have to come, you know." Rory said, watching him thoughtfully.

Jess slowly lifted his head and looked at Rory. He looked truly puzzled by her words. After a long moment, he said seriously, "That never even occurred to me."

"Jess…" Rory said, her voice cracking. She felt her eyes sting and realized she had more tears after all.

Jess sank down in a chair, patting the one next to him. "Might as well get comfy, Gilmore. We're in for a long night."

"You're staying?" Rory asked as she sat down next to him, even though she already knew the answer.

"I didn't drive all this way and get two speeding tickets just to leave after 15 minutes." He countered, pulling a paperback out of his back pocket.

"You said you only got one speeding ticket." Rory reminded him. She reached for her purse and pulled out the book she had instinctively thrown in there before leaving the house.

"Huh." Jess smirked, opening his book to the page he had dog eared to mark his spot.

Rory hid a smile and shook her head. She looked down at the book of essays she'd brought, and over to the well-worn novel Jess had been carrying around with him.

Jess didn't look up from his book. "Trade?"

"Yes, please!" Rory exclaimed, and they exchanged books. Rory looked out of the corner of her eye and saw Jess smiling as he opened her book and started to read.

* * *

"Home sweet home." Rory said exhaustedly as she entered her house. Jess followed behind her, Trix clinging to his neck as he gave her a ride on his back.

"Eat, mama!" Trix called out as Jess swung her around so he was carrying her in his arms.

"That hospital applesauce didn't do it for you, huh kiddo?" Jess asked. He turned to Rory and they shared a tired smile.

"Go lie down." Jess directed. "I'll get her something to eat."

Rory shook her head even though she could feel her eyes closing against her will. She forced them to stay open as she said, "You got the same amount of sleep I did, maybe less."

"I'm fine." Jess insisted. "You think I worked with Chris and Matt for ten years without learning how to function after an all-nighter?"

Rory was too tired to crack a smile. She asked half-heartedly, "Are you sure?"

"I'm sure. Ten bucks says she eats like three bites of food before she passes out too. When she goes down, I'll crash on the couch if that's cool?"

"Of course." Rory agreed. She put a hand on Jess's shoulder and kissed Trix. "Jess is going to feed you, baby. Make sure you say 'thank you.'"

"Tanks, Jet." Trix said, looking up at Jess and patting his cheek.

Jess stopped in his tracks and his posture straightened. Rory could feel her spine go rigid as well. Trix had never said Jess's name before. Rory could feel her heart swell and her overtired eyes start to fill with tears as she took in the moment. Trix babbled all the time, but she didn't say a lot of words yet. Hearing her call Jess by name took Rory by very pleasant surprise, but she wasn't sure how Jess would feel about it.

"Huh." Jess said as his mouth curved up into a smile. He looked up at Rory, but didn't say anything. He looked back at Trix and kissed her forehead sweetly as he took her into the kitchen.


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N:** I got some truly amazing and wonderful comments after the last chapter, and I am truly and unbelievably grateful for your love and support. Unfortunately, I lost my father in May and I've been going through the hardest time in my life. I finally felt inspired to write again, and I hope you enjoy this final chapter. The epilogue will follow shortly.

 **Fourteen**

Rory lay in bed, staring blankly at the ceiling. She was exhausted beyond measure, but she couldn't sleep. Every time she closed her eyes, she was flooded with thoughts of Jess- covering Trix with a blanket when she shivered, getting up to check on her every time she stirred in the hospital bed, leaving to find apple juice for her when she woke up thirsty. Doing everything you'd expect from a worried father.

But he wasn't Trix's father. Rory kept coming back to that thought above all others. No matter how sweet he was with her, no matter how much he cared for her, he wasn't her father and he'd made it perfectly clear that he didn't want to be.

Had he? Rory contemplated the situation, and realized he'd never really said that. He'd said that he didn't know how he fit into their life, and that he didn't know if just caring about them was enough. He admitted he was scared he wasn't enough for them, but he never said he didn't _want_ to be enough for them. The distinction had seemed irrelevant a year ago, but now it seemed like a huge one. Jess was a good man, and Rory was in love with him.

Rory sat straight up in bed as her overtired brain finally jumped to the obvious conclusion she'd been ignoring for months. She was in love with Jess. Rory could feel her heart thudding in her chest as she nervously chewed on her thumbnail. God, how could she have been so stupid? She'd told him, and herself, that they'd tried and it didn't work- it was just too complicated to work. She'd convinced herself that it wasn't a big deal, that they'd move on and be happy as friends. How stupid had she been to believe that was true? To think that she could ever be happy being just his friend. There was more between them; there always had been. An energy, a connection that she'd never been able to ignore. And now that she was being completely honest with herself, she could admit she didn't want to ignore it anymore.

Rory leaned back against the headboard, her mind buzzing with thoughts. She didn't know how long she'd been sitting there like that when she started hearing noise on Trix's baby monitor.

"What'll it be, Trixie girl? Want to hear a story?" Jess sounded as tired as Rory felt, but she could tell he was keeping his tone pleasant for Trix's sake.

"Sing pwease." Trix's little voice said, and she sounded moments away from falling asleep herself.

"Geez, I'm not so good with the singing." Jess protested weakly. There was a moment of quiet and Rory knew from Jess's defeated sigh that Trix had turned her big, blue eyes on him. The next sound Rory heard was Jess's soft, off-key voice singing Time Bomb by Rancid. Rory clapped both hands over her mouth to stop from laughing.

Rory swung her legs over the side of the bed and pushed herself up before padding over to Trix's nursery. She stopped in the doorway and watched Jess sitting in the rocking chair with Trix in his lap, gently murmuring "black coat, white shoes, black hat, Cadillac, the boy's a time bomb."

Trix's eyes closed and her breathing evened out as she fell asleep. Jess gently lifted her in his arms and kissed her forehead before placing her in her crib. Her turned toward the door and smiled sheepishly when he saw Rory standing there.

He walked out of the nursery and quietly closed the door behind him before asking, "Any chance you didn't hear me singing?"

Rory pushed Jess up against the wall and crushed her mouth to his. Jess's response was immediate. He put his hands on her hips and pulled her closer, deepening the kiss and pressing his body against hers. He effortlessly lifted Rory off her feet and spun her around so she was the one with her back against the wall. She wrapped her arms around his neck as they continued to kiss, Jess's hands roaming over her. He finally pulled away from her, breathless.

"The fact we haven't done that in almost a year is a travesty." Jess said seriously, tucking Rory's hair behind her ear.

"Yeah?" Rory asked, biting her lip thoughtfully. "You're sure you mean that and you're not just delirious with exhaustion?"

"Rory…" Jess started.

"I was a fucking idiot." He said, at the same time Rory said, "I think I was wrong."

They both laughed, and Jess brought his hands to Rory's face as he looked in her eyes. He kissed her again, sweetly at first but it quickly became more passionate. Rory grabbed his hand and pulled him into her bedroom, closing the door behind her.

"Rory, we don't-."

"Shut up, Jess." Rory said firmly, kissing him again and pushing him back onto her bed.

* * *

Rory curled up against Jess and laid her head on his chest, completely spent and happy.

"That was long overdue." Jess murmured, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her forehead.

"Mmm." Rory said, not capable of forming any words. Exhaustion was finally taking over and her eyes felt heavy as she closed them.

"I love you, you know." Jess said from beside her, and Rory's eyes popped back open. She sat up in bed and pulled the sheet up over her, suddenly aware of her state of undress. Jess sat up too, but seemed to have no problems with the fact that he was naked.

"I love you too." Rory said quietly, feeling heat flood her cheeks. Jess smirked and pulled her to him, placing a lingering kiss on her mouth. Rory accepted his kiss, but immediately sprung out of bed to pull on her underwear and a t-shirt. She knew it was stupid to feel self-conscious after what they'd just said, not to mention the things they'd been doing before, but Rory couldn't help it.

"If you're trying to keep me from seeing that tattoo, it's too late for that." Jess's voice turned into a low growl and Rory turned to face him, blushing again at the heated look in his eyes. She hadn't even been thinking about the dumb tattoo she'd gotten, but now she lifted the hem of the shirt so they could both look at the to-go coffee cup on her hip.

"My mom and I got matching ones." Rory declared, looking down at it and the stretch marks surrounding it.. "When I turned 30. That's what you noticed?"

"Not the only thing." Jess assured her, his eyes still dark and his voice tantalizingly low. He offered his hand and when Rory took it, he pulled her down into his lap and began kissing her neck.

Rory giggled and felt immediately stupid for thinking he cared about her stretch marks or that her stomach wasn't perfectly flat like it had been when they were teenagers. He didn't look the same as he had back then either, and that was a good thing. He'd grown into an unbelievably sexy man. And he loved her, which just made him even sexier.

"I got one too." Jess confessed conspiratorially, whispering in her ear and making her shiver.

"A coffee cup tattoo?" Rory asked skeptically, making him chuckle.

"Not a coffee cup." Jess said, shifting his position so she could see his back. Inked in between his shoulder blades in a font that looked like typewriting were the words 'passionate bright young things' followed by a small, black star.

Rory traced the words lightly with her finger and said, "I knew you took Bowie's death harder than you let on."

Jess shrugged and turned back to face her. "Who didn't?"

"Touche." Rory murmured. She put a hand on the side of Jess's face and leaned her forehead against his. She closed her eyes and heard Jess chuckle.

"C'mon." He said, guiding her so she laid back down. "Get some sleep before Trixie wakes up."

"You too." Rory commanded sleepily, snuggling up against him.

"Love you." Rory murmured. Even though she was exhausted, she took great reverence in being able to say those words to him.

"Love you too." Jess whispered, and they both finally fell asleep.


	15. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

 _5 years later_

"Lorelai Annabelle Gilmore-Mariano!" Rory called as she walked into the living room. Jess was writing in a notebook while Trix sat on the couch next to him, her baby brother Billy in her lap. She was completely surrounded by pillows to keep her from fidgeting while she held him.

"Uh-oh, full name." Jess observed, closing his notebook and looking down at his daughter. "What'd you do?"

Trix shrugged, but her blue eyes were wide and scared.

"What did she do?" Rory asked, hands on her hips. She was glaring, but at her husband. "She stole one of the lawn gnomes from in front of Babette's house."

Jess tried to stop himself from laughing, but couldn't prevent the corners of his mouth from turning up into a smile as he turned to face Trix and asked, "Which one?"

"Ludwig." Trix said. In a conspiratorial whisper she added to her father, "Pierpont was too heavy."

This time Jess couldn't control it and a loud laugh escaped him, which caused Billy to start to giggling in Trix's lap.

"Come here, Billy." Rory said, picking up her son. "You're surrounded by terrible influences."

"Do I have to give Ludwig back now, mommy?" Trix asked with a serious expression.

"Of course you do!" Rory exclaimed as she rocked Billy. "What's it called when we take stuff that doesn't belong to us?"

Trix's eyes got wide and filled with tears. "Stealing, but I wasn't stealing! I was pranking. Daddy says it's different!"

"It is different, Trixie!" Jess said, pulling her into his lap. "Tell mommy why."

"Cuz when you steal, you keep it forever. Pranks are funny, and you give the stuff back!" Trix stated matter-of-factly. She accentuated her statement with a firm nod at the same time that Jess did, and now it was Rory who had to hide her laughter.

"Not everyone thinks pranks are funny, sweetheart." Rory said, but she was smiling affectionately at the pair of them now.

"Why not?" Trix asked, looking between her parents for an answer.

"The kid raises a valid question, Ror." Jess said innocently, causing his wife to glare at him.

Rory shook her head and said, ""You're just going to have to trust me on this one, kiddo. Go get Ludwig and return him to Babette."

Trix turned her big eyes to Jess, who smirked and dropped a hand on his daughter's head. "Mom wins this one, Trixie. Go grab the gnome and run over to Grandma's house. Tell her your hoodlum father taught you how to steal a lawn gnome. When she stops laughing, ask her to take you over to return it."

Trix sighed dramatically, "Fine!" She dashed from the room, leaving Rory and Jess alone with their snoozing son.

Jess smirked at Rory, who continued to glare at him. "Don't look at me like that. I wanted to move to Philly. No lawn gnomes there."

"First of all, I am sure there are some people in Philadelphia that have lawn gnomes. Second, you love living here and you know it. "Third-."

"Third, just shut up and kiss me, Gilmore." Jess said, taking a few steps forward and putting his hands on Rory's waist. She shifted Billy and gave him a sweet kiss.

"That's Gilmore-Mariano, sir." Rory said. "Let me put him down."

Rory walked into the nursery and laid Billy down in his crib. She didn't realize Jess had followed her until he snaked his arms around her waist and rested his chin on her shoulder.

"We do good work." He murmured as they looked down at their sleeping baby.

"Can't argue with you there." Rory responded, turning in his arms and kissing him deeply.

They pulled apart and smiled softly at each other.

"I think I'm just about done with my latest chapter." Jess said, brushing Rory's hair off her face.

"Yay!" Rory exclaimed. "My turn!"

 _Gilmore Girls_ had been more successful than Rory ever could have dreamed. After the initial run had sold out, Random House had signed Rory to a three-book deal. For the final book, she and Jess had pitched a joint project. Rory had been inspired by Jess's version of their time in New York, the one he'd written in response to the first chapter about him in _Gilmore Girls_. They'd pitched a novel where each chapter was written first from one character's point of view and then the other's, and Random House greenlit it. The two were having an amazing time working together, even though their individual writing processes couldn't be more different.

It was also the final push that got Jess to step back from the day-to-day business of Truncheon. He was now strictly a silent partner. Well, most days. Rory still occasionally heard him on the phone, arguing with Matt about new printing presses and additional inventory. Rory didn't mind at all. She was just happy that he was always at home now, helping her raise their two children.

They had married right after Trix turned three, and it wasn't long after that Logan had signed away his parental rights so Jess could formally adopt her. It wasn't even a question for them. Jess was the only father she'd ever known. He couldn't have loved her more if she was biologically his, and it had been a happy, tear-filled day when Trix became a Mariano.

"I loved what you did in your last chapter." Jess said as he took her hand and led her from their son's nursery. "That speech that Lana gave on the rooftop gave me so much to work with."

"Thanks." Rory said. They returned to the living room and Jess sat on the couch, pulling Rory into his lap. "You didn't think it was cheesy?"

"Of course it was." Jess said, kissing Rory's neck and tightening his grip around her. "But Lana is cheesy. That's why it works. And it gives Adam this great moment to reevaluate his skepticism."

Rory leaned back against him and said, "It's slowly becoming a romance novel, you know."

"Hush." Jess said and Rory could feel him smirking against her hair. "It is a stark coming-of-age tale about being disillusioned and disappointed in the life you've been promised."

"Where the protagonist meets a spunky, optimistic girl who changes his outlook on life." Rory pointed out to her husband.

"Every story needs a bit of hope, Gilmore. Doesn't make it a romance."

"Doesn't it?" She asked, still smiling.

"Nope." Jess insisted.

There was a slam of the front door and Trix came tearing through. "I returned Ludwig and I'm going to my room to read ok bye!"

Rory sighed. "You saw what she had in her hands, right?"

Jess was laughing as he said, "Hey, you didn't say anything about her taking ceramic cats."

Rory had to laugh as she said, "She is absolutely your daughter."

"Damn right she is." Jess said proudly, tipping Rory's chin up and meeting her mouth in a kiss.

 **The End**

 **Final Author's Note:** Thank you all for reading this story. I really felt compelled to write it because I saw so many stories where Jess was happy or excited about Rory's pregnancy and it just seems to me like it'd be way more complicated than that. I hope I did the characters justice and that you enjoyed reading this story. Thank you all so much! - Cara, aka Francesca Jones


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